(Closed) BF is not going to do an official ‘proposal’

posted 9 years ago in Waiting
Post # 3
Member
53 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: January 2010

No, it’s not strange at all.

We didn’t have a "traditional" proposal. We just decided we wanted to get married and that was it! I’ve spoken to a number of other couples who avoided the planned, down-on-one-knee type proposal.

Don’t worry about what other people will think is strange. You clearly think that this is the best way for you and your Boyfriend or Best Friend to get engaged. That’s all that matters. Keep doing what feels right and have fun!

Post # 4
Member
2562 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2010

We didn’t have a big romantic "down on one knee" proposal … honestly I think the down on one knee things is weird and antiquated … We took the dog for a walk like usual, sat on a bench and he asked (not for me to marry him, but if I wanted to spend the rest of our lives together) … the story doesn’t get many ooh’s and aah’s … but I think that it was perfectly fitting for us.

Post # 5
Member
997 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2010 - The Pierre Hotel

Congratulations on your upcoming engagement.

I don’t think not having a traditional proposal is strange at all – what matters is what you (and your boyfriend) are comfortable with.  If you are fine with it, then that’s all that matters!  To each his/her own – my FH’s proposal was very low key, at home – just the way I liked it.  I’m quite shy and if did a more traditional restaurant-type proposal, I probably would have been mortified (at the situation, not the proposal, LOL).

Bottom line – if it works for you, then it’s fine!

Post # 6
Member
33 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: January 2010

A proposal doesn’t have to involve getting down on one knee. I don’t think it matters so long as the meaning is there which is that he is telling you he wants to take the next step and get married!! Good luck!

Post # 7
Member
5993 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: May 2010

same here.. no big romantic, insert movie music here proposal moment for us either

we chose the ring together, actually it was more him than me because what i thought i wanted in a ring is different to what we decided on but when he picked up the ring he came home and did put it on my finger which was a nice romantic moment and then it was over as we hit the phones and visited the families

so youre not alone on this…..

 

Post # 8
Member
1104 posts
Bumble bee

I was fine with not having a proposal – I felt like my Boyfriend or Best Friend was under enough pressure from me, so I told him that I didn’t need one. All he had to do was say "ok I’m ready" (which I had already said) and then I pictured us going to buy a ring together, and telling everyone. But he wanted to do the old-fashioned romantic thing. In the end I’m glad to have such a cute story, and I’m glad he got the chance to plan something (he also likes it bc it gives him an excuse to not get involved in wedding planning – he says he’s done his part now!). I think whatever suits you as a couple is the most important thing.

Post # 9
Member
3285 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: November 2009

I always thought I’d be okay with that too, but I am very glad (in my situation) that I got ‘the’ proposal.  Everyone is different and if that works for you, that’s the most important! 

Post # 10
Member
461 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: March 2009

 While I did not demand a "down on one knee" circus  , I have to admit I’d be a little disappointed  if all he did was hand me a ring. There are so many different  , and private , ways to "pop the question". But personally I love surprises  , so I imagine that has something to do with it.

Post # 11
Member
635 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

We have a ring, but did not have a proposal.  We decided to get married, set a date, a few months later – he bought a ring, it came in when he was out of town, but I waited till he came home to put it on.  And that was that.  It is what worked for us, and I have no regrets.

Post # 12
Member
20 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: December 1969

My fiance and I had talked about getting married for a while.  I picked out the ring, we had begun the planning, but with no deposits.  I felt bad because he got so nervous he could barely ask.  I had to laugh at him (and of course say yes) because he was still nervous I wouldn’t say yes.  It was really cute, but I wouldn’t feel bad if he didn’t have to have the nerves going crazy.

Post # 13
Member
184 posts
Blushing bee

Ms.Mini, your proposal story sounds just like mine!

Getting proposed to was very nice, but hardly necessary. He did it because he wanted to do it. I’ve heard some elaborate stories and ones like yours, Miss Summertime. With most things wedding related, if you have a problem with how other people percieve you and judge your wedding, the more traditional route is usually the safer route. If you have no issues with that, then who the hell cares what you do so long as it makes you happy?! Congrats, by the way! 

Post # 14
Member
2725 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2009

We didn’t really have big proposal. We had looked at rings a few months before but then talked about him not even getting me a ring and then I would just have very blingy wedding band. My birthday, Christmas, New Years, and our anniversary all passed without a ring or proposal. Then one day he took off work as a sick day to supposedly get some things to get done and to spend the day with me. We were getting ready to go to his parents and I had been joking that I wasn’t going to put any of my rings on because his mom was always grabbing my hand and looking for an engagement ring. I started getting irritated because he was dawdling and acting all goofy. Finally he hands me the ring box and says I guess then you should wear this.

He didn’t slip the ring on my finger, he didn’t get down on one knee. I don’t even think he really said Will You Marry Me. But it was still sweet and romantic and special.

Post # 15
Member
2820 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: February 2013

My fiance really really wanted to do a full-out traditional, romantic proposal, but he needs to work a little on his planning, so it didn’t really work out as such. 😉 Sometimes I wish it had…but frankly, it’s enough that we are engaged, and it’s always fun to tell people when they ask that "I punched him, and he proposed". XD

Post # 16
Member
999 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: January 2010 - Mr. P's Grandparents’ Ranch

It was kind of funny for us, we talk about getting married while he was here with me in Chile, then he "proposed" over the phone. (he hated it because we are engaged but no ring on my finger)

we will see each other about 3 to 4 months before the wedding so he said he wanted to do the "romantic surprise" proposal with ring in hand thing (even thought at that time our invitations will be ready for the mail and our wedding already planned) witch i dont really think is necessary. To me the most important thing is that both are willing to commit and spend forever together 🙂

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