BF just found out he has a baby coming…

posted 5 months ago in Relationships
Post # 121
Member
566 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2018

DoubleD :  The difference (as I’m reading things) is that her Boyfriend or Best Friend and FWB had unprotected sex and got pregnant. OP had a defective IUD and got pregnant. 

Not disagreeing that things don’t line up exactly, but as I see it she was at least trying to avoid pregnancy.

Post # 122
Member
1439 posts
Bumble bee

Are we really still talking about the unprotected sex? OP wasn’t personally there to witness what went on when they were getting it on, so she’s just going off of what he said. 

As if it really makes a difference at this point… 

Post # 123
Member
10267 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 2010

annabeth929 :  

Here, I feel the need to share my new 2019 mantra. It’s proving to be a phenomenally good choice.

Does it matter?

Post # 124
Member
1900 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2016

i would walk away from this, at least for now. He doesnt want marraige, has a kid on the way from an ex, and expects you to be a step mom. Which means more then likely you will at some point also probably be financially contributing to semi raising this kid, regardless of what any three of you say, cause lets be honest youll probably be spending some form of money in helping him out when and if you guys actually live together.  

id personally take a break from him at least for a few months, let him figure his baby mama drama out and if you guys still want to be together then great get back together. Being long distance i know is hard enough, but adding a kid that isnt yours to the picture is going to make it SO much more complicated then either one of you expect. 

Post # 125
Member
71 posts
Worker bee

These are his issues to sort out not yours. As hard as it may be, could you consider just being friends for the next six months and see what happens? Let him sort out how he will handle his new role as a father. He will be tied to this woman for the rest of his life as the mother of his child. Do you want this kind of complication in your life? If its meant to be, you can come back together in six months. You should keep your options open and consider dating others. I am sure you could love this baby but he is not in a position now to give you what you need or want. 

 

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