Post # 1
My Boyfriend or Best Friend (of nearly 2 years) admitted to me the other night that he has thought about getting married since we started officially dating (we’ve known eachother a very long time at this point). He said he’s always thought that he wouldn’t propose until I finished my degree (I’m in a PhD program). I have about a year and a half (give or take) left before I finish my degree. Boyfriend or Best Friend said he didn’t want me to have to worry about planning a wedding while I was trying to finish my dissertation. I really appreciate that, but I’ve always wanted to get married shortly after finishing — say I defend in March I’d like to get married sometime that summer.
I didn’t say anything other than “aww” at the thought that he, too, has been thinking about this from day 1. I don’t want to tell him when to propose, but I would like to maybe suggest he doesn’t wait till I finish my degree to do it… there are other mitigating factors here too, such as he is still looking for work after finishing his degree in May so I don’t expect him to be able to propose for a bit of time while he saves up after getting a job, but I don’t want him to feel like he has to wait until I get my degree to propose, if that makes sense…
Post # 3
My thought? Talk to him! He’s going to be your husband sooner rather than later right? (yay!) Just level with him. Tell him what you told us. You didn’t necessarily want to wait but if you have to, you will. You don’t want to dictate when he proposes and you know there are other factors at play… but in your perfect world you would be engaged soon. And then tell him it is in his hands and try to let it go. 🙂
Post # 4
Maybe you should let him know that planning a wedding can take a long time and that he should keep that in mind for the timing of when he proposes.
I you two are having an open discussion about timelines, you should feel comforatble letting him know how you feel.
Post # 5
I would just tell him in your ideal situation you’d like to get married shortly after you graduate. Ask him what he thinks of the possibility. Tell him you don’t want to be rushed in planning but you also don’t want him to be rushed in proposing and see if there is a timeframe that works better for both of you.
Post # 6
It sounds like you two already have pretty open communication when it comes to that topic, so I bet he was just using that as a starting point to see what your thoughts were. I’d remind him that you could be engaged while in school, then have the wedding after you graduate, so that still keeps the wedding out of your school schedule. The longer you have to plan, the better, I think. If you incorporate wedding talk into some daily conversation, it might be even easier to casually discuss what both of you have in mind. Good luck!