(Closed) Bf sleeps in bed with mother when she visits

posted 5 years ago in Family
  • poll: Weird or not weird?

    Weird

    Not weird

  • Post # 61
    Member
    5783 posts
    Bee Keeper

    I think issues like this arise when age appropriate boundaries aren’t set as a child grows up. What is normal for a 3 year old is different for a 10 year old, what’s okay at 8 isn’t necessarily okay at 18. I think cultural differences are over-estimated sometimes with issues like this, there are anomalies for every norm and I’d bet this would be odd even within your bf’s own culture. I sincerely doubt there is anything sexual going on, but that doesn’t make it appropriate either. I especially wonder at him turning down your offer of the blow up mattress to share and fear you’ll be marrying a man-child who puts his parents wishes and opinions ahead of his wife’s.

    Post # 62
    Member
    3305 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: November 1999

    It definitely seems weird to me and inappropriate as well. My sister however breastfed her son until he was 4(!) and he has always slept with her and he’s almost 6. I could see her doing this….

    Post # 63
    Member
    7313 posts
    Busy Beekeeper
    • Wedding: February 1997

    I’d never share a bed with another adult (besides my DH). I think it is odd regardless of whether the person is male or female. Heck, at my age I don’t even like to share a hotel room with another adult. When my mum and I travelled for my BIL’s funeral we shared a car, but not a hotel room.

    But I also understand it is cultural. I have friends who have a much different sense of boundaries than I have, and kiss relatives on the lips and hug everyone in sight. Sharing beds isn’t an issue for them, either. So I am not prepared to say it is universally weird or that there’s anything in particular wrong with it, but it isn’t something I would do. 

    Post # 64
    Member
    620 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: October 2016

    Weird… but I also find it weird when kids (both young and older) and their parents kiss on the lips –

    But – meh…guess it’s how they roll… 

    Post # 65
    Member
    39 posts
    Newbee
    • Wedding: September 2016

    RUN FOR THE HILLS!!!!

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