Post # 1
Yesterday, my bf bought me my Christmas gift. He said that he also looked at some rings. About an hour after, I asked, “Did you reaaaally look at rings?” And he goes, “Well I saw them, but no I didn’t get you a ring.” UMM, OUCH!?!?!? Unfortunately, now that we have talked about marriage and it has led to some low-dose nagging, I feel like marriage is becoming a stinging, loaded topic. I feel like he gets defensive/turned off and though he plans to propose in July, I feel like he wants the independence of planning the proposal at his own pace. How can you blame him? But now that I am not nagging him, he seems to be the one throwing shots about engagement (Or lack of) at me and it hurts. I know it won’t happen for a while, I’ve accepted that yet feel like he’s rubbing it in. I understand this is the big thing he gets to plan on his own. Has anyone’s boyfriend/now FI/now husband ever done this?
Post # 3
Yes. My now-FI used to tell me stuff like that all of the time. It seems like he REALLY wants this to be a surprise for you. I know that it is difficult to be patient and not bring it up. But, in the end, being surprised with a proposal is SO worth it!
Post # 4
Honestly I never brought up a propsal to my now Fi… we had discussed our futures, what we’d do in certain situations and what we each wanted for our futures, but I never asked, nagged or begged him to propose! When he was ready he did it all on his own [3 years after living together]
Post # 5
@arsing89: Thank you for your sweet comment & understanding. Could it be that maybe he’s doing this to throw me off??!?! LOL we’ll see. He’s not a mean-spirited person at all. I was just taken aback.
Post # 6
@fainavach1992: Honestly, he could be. I really don’t think he was trying to be mean-spirited. What is probably going on inside of his head is that he feels like you are trying to “ruin” whatever he may be planning. I know you aren’t purposefully trying to ruin anything, but let him do his thing.
Believe me, I tried to figure out exactly when my FI was going to propose. I hate being surprised. But, he got me. And it was worth it. It was seriously the most perfect day of my life.
Post # 7
@arsing89: That’s awesome! Congrats!! Wishing you the very best!
I’ve ruined previous surprises and it really hurt us. I’m hoping I can relax for the next few months.
Post # 8
- Wedding: February 2017 - Seattle, WA
@fainavach1992: I don’t read this as him rubbing it in. It sounds to me like he’s letting you know he’s starting the ring shopping process, thinking that would make you happy. I would certainly be excited if I found out my SO was looking!