(Closed) BF was hiding communication with an EX and lied about it…..

posted 5 years ago in Relationships
Post # 2
1773 posts
Buzzing bee

I say cut it off! 

Post # 3
9581 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2015

View original reply
jesbea1:  he is completely playing you, lying to you and has been for over a year. Changing her name in his phone so he can keep talking to her? Play dates? Kissy faces? Selfies? She drives him crazy? He’s likely sleeping with her but even if he isnt, the lying and flirty convos are enough. Have some self-respect and dump that ass asap. Like now. Or yesterday. Or last year.

Post # 4
301 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2015

Sounds to me like you don’t want to be in this relationship anymore. And I can’t blame you. I hate lying and misdirection and sneaking. 


Post # 5
11428 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2015

I only got halfway through this and he’s already lied multiple times. Trust is gone. 

You know what to do.

Post # 6
4033 posts
Honey bee

View original reply
jesbea1:  Sorry I did not read the entire post, but I will say I had a similar experience with an ex that just couldn’t let his ex go, despite knowing she was trouble, but she burned him and he never really got over it. I found out he was talking to her behind my back, and after three years together, he secretly went out to dinner with her behind my back and kissed her goodnight. His excuse for why they went to dinner? He needed closure. His excuse for not telling me? He didn’t want me to be upset. His excuse for kissing her? I don’t even know, because I dumped him. My ex was also very secretive about what went down between him and his ex and why he was so hurt. He finally told me all about her when we broke up.

Your Boyfriend or Best Friend obviously has some issues with his ex that he isn’t over, and I hate to say it, but no matter how great he knows you are, it seems like he’s going to end up hurting you regardless. 

Post # 7
3535 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: December 2015

View original reply
jesbea1:  he has repeatedly lied to u. When is enough going to be enough for u to walk away???

Post # 9
3109 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: March 2016 - Surfer\'s Beach, Grand Cayman

I stopped at wanting another “play date” and that she drives him crazy. I would take that to mean he slept with her and has been having an inappropriate ongoing relationship with her of some kind. 

Post # 11
2509 posts
Sugar bee

If he had nothing to hide he wouldn’t be hiding it or lying about it :-/ Sorry girl, better to know now though.

Post # 12
1398 posts
Bumble bee

You will probably get more replies if you edit your post to have paragraphs.  THat was extremely difficult to get through.

This relationship is over.  He does not have excellent values and morales – he is dating you both.  It is perfect that you live so far away because he will never get caught.

Post # 13
3387 posts
Sugar bee

View original reply
jesbea1:  You already know the answer, he is dishonest with you and obviously cares more about keeping this ex in his life than protecting your relationship.  “Play date” and “drives him crazy” — yeah that is insane how little respect he has for your relationship.  Even if he isn’t physically cheating, he is very obviously emotionally cheating and is checked out of your relationship.  Find yourself someone who will give you the love and respect you deserve.

Post # 14
953 posts
Busy bee

He doesn’t have a choice if you take it away from him. I f-ing hate hearing about a guy saying “you are the one I want”…ok..so if your the one he wants why is he playing with someone else? 

Honestly I feel bad for the ex. He is dating you and screwing her and keeping her on the back burner if you guys don’t work out . 

And sorry. ..it’s easy to block texts and calls.  I hate that bull too when people say “but they keep contacting me”. You can only contact people if they allow it and obviously he is all for continuing the contact.


I’d show him how blocking works.

Post # 15
56 posts
Worker bee

I went though a very similar experience in the past. And I would excuse it by saying “he’s a great guy though! Great morals! Great values!”

until one day I was like wait…no. He’s not great because he makes me feel second best. And he doesn’t have great morals and values if he is lying, cheating, sneaking, and basically being a big coward. 

Do not love someone more than you love yourself and do not excuse bad behavior when it hurts you, repeatedly.  

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