(Closed) BFP – Shouldn't I be excited?

posted 6 years ago in TTC
Post # 3
3059 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

@iheartnerds:  Lady, you should be pumped!! And please don’t take this the wrong way, but there are many many of us who have been TTC for quite some time now, who would absolutley give their left leg to be in your position right now. Take some breathers and realize your going to be a mommy! I think once it finally kicks in, you will be excited. Have fun telling hubby.

Post # 4
752 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

First off, Congratulations!!  I admit I didn’t feel excited the day I got my BFP.  It was strange and didn’t really feel real. 

I am not disappointed that I am missing out on drinking because we’d tried for several months with no luck.  I was delighted that it finally worked but it still felt really weird looking at that second line that I’d been praying for.

Give it a little time and I’m sure you’ll come around.  Today try to think of a fun way to share the news with your Darling Husband. 

Post # 5
2702 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: November 2011


Post # 6
7293 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2011


Don’t worry about the little details (beers, birthday, etc), focus on the magnitude of awesome of creating a child with your husband!

Post # 7
5475 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: August 2012

You will be excited.  My first thought when I got my BFP was “Oh my GOD- what have we DONE?!?!?” then I was excited, then nervous, then scared to death, then excited again… it was a cycle that continued for a day or so! 

It sank in a little when I told MrDane- he was over the moon!  We told my parents who were also completely overjoyed.  It really did help my confidence in that they were happy for us, not terrified that we would be in charge of another human life.

Oh, and I didn’t have any symptoms either.  I was super tired between 4 and 5 weeks, had some queasiness/nausea from about 6/7 weeks until recently (I’m 9 weeks) but I still need a nap sometimes and if I get too hungry I get an upset stomach.  Some people have sypmtoms the whole time, others are lucky!

As for our timing, well we had planned to start TTC in August (the month we married) but since it never works the first time, we had a “practice” month in July… well we see how that went ๐Ÿ™‚  I was almost 8 weeks pregnant at my wedding, so I didn’t drink at my bridal shower, bach party, or the wedding.  Sure, we could have waited a month, but we didn’t know it would happen for us so quickly.  We are so incredibly lucky that we have been blessed with this gift so soon, it kind of overshadows the fact that I didn’t have a glass of wine at my wedding.

Post # 8
5109 posts
Bee Keeper

@iheartnerds:  Well, congrats! Not sure what to say about being disappointed, you’re gonna be a mom! It’ll set in sometime soon and you’ll be happy.

Post # 9
1026 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

There is no such thing as what you SHOULD feel.  Just be OK with what you DO feel. Everyone reacts differently to emotionally huge events. Clearly you want a child, since you were TTC.  You’ll be excited when you are ready to be. Don’t worry. There is no “normal”. ๐Ÿ™‚ Best wishes for a happy and healthy 9 months!

Post # 11
9824 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper

Feelings are just feelings. They aren’t always rational. I got horrible news once and burst out laughing because I was shocked. Shelve the beer and birthday issue and think “I have been given an amazing gift.” Remind yourself until it becomes real. Congrats!

Post # 12
1243 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: December 2010

@iheartnerds:  Your feelings don’t make you a horrible person, dude.  All feelings are fair- it’s what you do that matters.  

First of all, I’d say you feel this way because this isn’t real yet.  It’s not real for a lot of people.  DH and I had been trying for 6 months when I got my BFP and I just stared at the stick…and screamed when I found out.  I was excited but I was also shocked.  I tested the next day…and the next because I just couldn’t believe it. Full disclosure: I tested after a night out at the bar.  My period wasn’t late and I was having pre-period symptoms…and I was pretty bummed.  On the way home, things just didn’t feel right and I just decided to test on a whim.  I’m now 33 weeks (as of Friday). 

Shit didn’t get real for me all at once.  It’s happened over time.  First ultrasound, first feeling of movment, the starting of pre natal classes, buying stuff the nursery…all add to the realness.  Still, from what I hear, it can take until you go into labour or even when you bring the baby home for this to sink in.  It’s HUGE.  Don’t beat yourself up for feeling whatever you feel.  The mother-guilt starts early and it’s going to get more intense.  For example, I have horrible guilt right now that my pregnancy hasn’t been that fun.  I don’t feel great pretty much all of the time, the first 4 months were MISERABLE, and I didn’t get that burst of engery you’re “supposed” to get in the 2nd trimester.  I can’t sleep.  I’m tired.  I’m emotional.  I feel gross. It makes me feel awful that I just want to meet this person and get to the Mom bits…I honestly don’t like being pregnant, but love my baby, you know?  So, you just realised that life isn’t going to be the same…the changes start early.  That’s big, scary stuff.  Own that.  

Now go out and find some fab way of telling your Darling Husband.  It will hit you and it will be great.  Congrats!


Post # 14
70 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: November 2011

@iheartnerds:  At 26 weeks, it still doesn’t feel real to me; but, you will love being pregnant when you get used to it. After I jumped up and down for a minute I ran up to tell my husband and he was like, “oh, okay.” He was so not excited until the first appointment when there was no denying the little baby growing in my tummy, the heartbeat was what sold him.

Plus, I bought the husband tickets to go parasailing and was little bummed when I realized that I would have to sit it out.

Post # 15
1301 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

Congratulations!!!! I’d kill for a bfp so I’m mega excited for you!!!!

Post # 16
1934 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

Congrats!  I think it’s normal to feel meh at first.  Honestly, I was so in shock, I don’t think I really felt…anything.  I was zombified for a few days lol

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