(Closed) Biggest lesson you've learned from wedding panning….

posted 6 years ago in Recaps
Post # 3
Member
699 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

RSVP’ing promptly and accurately in the future, for sure!

Writing a nice card, with a message or story in it for the couple.

Cash is the best gift ever, so are registry items.  Don’t stray.

Post # 4
Member
1668 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: March 2012

Leading up to the wedding never tell the bride how exhausted you are.  No one is more exhausted than her.  Someone said this to me while we were doing last minute running around 3 days before the wedding and I had to use all my power to keep  from saying, “i have been doing this for 2 months, so i don’t give a ** if you are exhausted after half a day!” I was by no means a bridezilla but that just aggravated me so bad.

As a guest, don’t expect the couple to plan your logistics, they’ve got enough going on.  Call someone else, use the internet, read your invitation or their website.  I was so annoyed with people thinking it was my job to handle their small details.

Never write a check out to Mrs. His lastname.  Even if she intends to change her name, it’s a long process and your bank gives you hassle about it because it’s technically not your name.  Give cash or make it out to both their actual names with an “OR.”

Don’t disturb the couple while they are eating.  I know you are excited but they probably haven’t eaten all day and won’t get to again in the evening.  Let them eat.

 

 

Post # 5
Member
871 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

That vendors don’t get back to you when they specified. Family will always butt in and have their 2 cents.

Post # 6
Member
1839 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

that when I ask my Future Mother-In-Law to do something for me, she thinks it means she can do w/e she wants and will sign contracts for hotel blocks w/o even asking my Fiance and I if this is ok.

Post # 7
Hostess
11113 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

I’d tell a future couple to stick to their guns to what they want for their special and if family try to intervene, then put your foot down

Post # 8
Member
640 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

@NJmeetsBX:  I hope this doesn’t happen to me because I am not changing my name. This is one of my biggest worries because it isn’t like you can tell all of your guests not to do it without it sounding like you are expecting money. Although, We would rather have money than gifts just because we have been living on pur own for so long.

Post # 9
Member
1668 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

Biggest thing I’ve learned is that working with other people on a stressfull event SUCKS.

Post # 10
Member
246 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2014

I have learned to BUDGET and research prices before buying. WISH I WOULDNT HAVE PAID FOR A WEDDING PLANNER AS HER SERVICES ARE NO LONGER NEEDED! I am and HAVE been doing everything on my own and feel I wont be satisfied if not. Could have saved $800 as now she will just show up for NOTHING! GRR! LOL

She was supposed to come with chargers, pomanders, etc and I went out and bought my own. I do not like depending on people and thought I would get out much cheaper just using her items…but I WAS WRONG. I bought them myself so I dont have to worry and it was MUCH cheaper plus I know I can resell and make my wedding even cheaper. (Im paying for my own wedding).

Post # 11
Member
2359 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

I’ve learned

– You can’t please everyone

– Stick to your guns

– A little niceness goes a long way – when dealing with vendors etc.  i’ve gotten great deals just from being nice, and not a b*tch or demanding

– Where there’s a will there’s a way – you can have whatever you want on your day and still save money by DIY or doing lots of research. 

Post # 12
Member
2781 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

@Firinne:  well, if you get along with your Future Mother-In-Law then you could always just get her to cash it for you and your Fiance

Post # 13
Member
1668 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: March 2012

@Firinne:  This will absolutely happen to you.  More than half the checks we got were made out to Mr and Mrs HisLastName.  There’s a few problems with this.  As the check is written to BOTH of you, it legally should be cashed by BOTH or go into an account with BOTH your names.  And of course, that’s not the bride’s name and also it assumes you have a joint account (we don’t). So if your bank is real sticklers about this they may not accept the check.  I am a former teller so I anticipated issues.  I went to the ATM and deposited them and haven’t had any problems but only AFTER a teller refused to deposit them.

Post # 14
Member
416 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

Dont wait till one month before to find shoes, veil and bustier. 

Dont expect everyone to think your wedding is as important to them as it is to you.

Expect your girlfriends to act weird about u getting married. 

Post # 15
Member
2622 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

Its not as big a deal as it seems for the vast majority of things brides stress over.

Don’t forget that relationships last longer than the one day. Don’t strain a relationship because of it.

Post # 16
Member
1230 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2011

Mine was that men really don’t give a shit about wedding stuff!  My poor husband was subjected to so much shit he didn’t care about!  I was crazed!  Obsessed!  I am glad I only gave myself 3 months to plan it !!

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