(Closed) Birth control methods: I need one that won't affect my sex life

posted 4 years ago in Intimacy
Post # 31
1909 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: February 2015

kcoast:  My skin is going through hell right now since switching from the pill to the Mirena. My sex drive is back, but my skin looks a mess! 😢

Post # 32
5886 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: April 2013

LadyBlackheart:  I’m not sure about BC methods but I just wanted to chime in to say that:

1) If you buy high quality lube it lasts way longer.  Don’t go KY, go with something from a good quality sex shop.  Try babeland or womyns ware.

2) What’s wrong with re-applying?

We use lube every time we have sex and neither of us finds it to be a turn off.   It feels good, so what’s the problem?

And on the BC side…for non hormonal and not condoms, you could consider a copper IUD.  I have never had one, and apparently it makes your period worse, so I wouldn’t, but a lot of people who don’t want hormones choose it.

I, like many others, have a mirena IUD and have never given birth.  Your gyno is giving you some seriously outdated information!  You might want to find someone else, because the skill of the provider is a BIG factor in how much it hurts.  Also, note that the mirena does have hormones, so you might not like it. 

Post # 33
492 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: December 2014

He finds your need for lube a “turn off” and “doesn’t like” condoms? Sounds like in addition to any issues arising from hormonal bc, having a selfish lover is likely contributing to your problems as well. =/

Post # 34
21 posts

Just wanted to throw in a good word about the Mirena. I’ve had it for over a year now and yes, they do say having it with no childbirth is more painful but I’m alive and well! It’s just for the initial insertion that it hurts like crazy and I was squeezing the nurse’s hand the whole time. Really just takes a few minutes. 

I’ve also heard that different pills can have different affects – I have a friend who would often vomit because of hers and that sounded AWFUL. She later switched pills and didn’t have a problem. Pills were a no-go for me as I have a really awful gag reflex.

As for side effects, my periods are much lighter but a bit longer. Nothing else I can think of; no cramps now (yay) and I haven’t noticed any difference in skin/sex drive. My dude is a country grown soldier who’s had to clean hotel rooms during college so let’s just say it’s hard to gross him out lol. I get grossed out before he does!

Post # 35
1165 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2017

stefzbee:  I noticed that for the first few months, my skin was perfectly fine and normal. Then it suddenly went through absolute hell and after about a month and a half, it’s clearing back up again. 

Post # 36
2523 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2014

I didn’t experience that, but I did start to get really overly emotional on the birth control pill and gain weight.  I too didn’t want to take hormones, and neither of us like condoms (I’m allergic to latex and the lamb skin ones seem weird and are expensive).  We have been charting my ovulation and using a combo of rhythm method and pulling out.  Unless I’m on my period or it is the week before, he will pull out.  We have never had any mess ups, or pregnancy scares and have been doing it since September without birth control.  We have sex regularly and don’t actively avoid ovualation (just he is super careful to pull out then).  I know we aren’t technically as well protected as when I was on the pill, but I feel so much better and happier, and we are married and stable enough that if we did get pregnant accidentally it would be the most amazing timing, but it also wouldn’t change the course of our lives or be the worse thing in the world.  

Post # 37
2546 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

LadyBlackheart:  I have a paraguard IUD (copper no hormones) and never had kids- my doctor said it was a non-issue and that she inserts them regularly (planned parenthood). She said that my risk of expelling the IUD in the first few months was increased because of never having kids, but after that I was in the clear. I’ve had it for 4+ years now and love it! The insertion was a little painful, but nothing crazy, and my periods were heavier but only for the first 6 months or so while my body was adjusting to it. I have a tilted (retrograde) uterous which made proper insertion a little more difficult (took a few tries) but nothing too bad.. Maybe look into getting a second opinion on the IUD because it sounds like that might be a good optoin for what you need/want.. 

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