(Closed) Birthday blues – anyone?

posted 12 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
2271 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2009

Oh I know all about doing it all yourself. And about your birthday being lost in the shuffle — my birthday is the day after the wedding and I have no doubt it will indeed be swept into the background. I was raised to expect a lot for my birthday whereas my Fiance considers it just another day. I USED to give myself a birthday present every year by rtaking off work, but now it comes at the very end of the summer session and I can not leave a couple hundred college students hanging.


DO be good to yourself on your birthday! Just because others do not value birthdays as much as you do DOES NOT MEAN THAT YOU ARE NOT IMPORTANT AND LOVED! You are very important so celebrate!

Post # 4
445 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2007

I can totally relate! I got married on September 1st and my birthday was the 16th. I felt that year, no one remembered. I realized that we just had a huge party to celebrate my husband and I, but don’t we all still get a day where everyone at least wishes you a happy birthday? Everyone except for maybe my husband forgot until they got some nudging from my husband. "Oh that’s right! It just slipped my mind b/c we just had your wedding…" Thanks

Then, the next year, my husband had class the night of my birthday and EVERYONE forgot…very depressing! My best friend was the only one who remembered and offered to at least hang out with me so that I wouldn’t have to be by myself that night. I was very disenchanted with everyone.

I’m sorry you’re going through the same thing! It’s always very sad when you are disappointed. So I know how you feel. Chin up, and happy birthday whenever it is!!!

Post # 5
250 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: March 2010

@Ms.Guava-tini – Happy Birthday!!  You should find a way to celebrate, even if it’s with a couple of friends, or even by yourself.  Take some money out of your wedding budget, and go get yourself a spa treatment, or buy yourself something you’d really love.

My birthday is on Saturday.  FI’s was last weekend, and he has never liked celebrating his.  I have always loved celebrating mine, and have had some great parties in the past.  My law school convocation was the day of my 25th birthday.  My 30th was a blast.  When I think about them, those birthday highlights are now hard to beat.  Mind you, I also used to put a lot of effort into planning and organizing.  

Life is just way too busy these days.  My birthday dinner on Saturday will just be with my Fiance and my parents.

The first time I had a quiet birthday, two years ago, it was really depressing.  I’m not upset about it at all this year, but I totally remember how it feels.  You tend to take stock of your life on your birthday.  You should be proud of what you’ve accomplished so far – you’re almost finished your professional training, you’ve found the love of your life.  And you haven’t even hit 30 yet!

Post # 6
7081 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: July 2009

Timely post for me.

First off, happy birthday!

I feel your pain, and wonder if we made an oops by putting our wedding so close to our birthdays.  His birthday was last week, and poor guy got a combined birthday/wedding present.  (Granted… it was a Kindle :), but still!)  My birthday is June 30th, and aside from falling on an inconvenient day of the week, it’s also 2 weeks before the wedding.  If we go have dinner that weekend with friends, then I’m happy enough.

I love birthdays, but like your fiance, my fiance thinks they’re just "meh".  Hurray for birthdays… they are the only day that we get specially dedicated to us as individuals!

Post # 7
2249 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: March 2021

I am such a birthday person. i spoil people and Fiance does a good job now. His birthday is the week before and his present is a surprise honeymoon- so it’s wedding related but good.

Happy Birthday!


Post # 9
1266 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2009

I know what you mean! I hope mine doesnt become that way – its 2 days before the wedding. I however kind of covered my grounds on that one by insisting the rehersal dinner be on my birthday – so its kind of a win win for me, a celebration for the rehersal dinner PLUS probably birthday cake and not to mention the fact I will apready be with all the people I would like to share it with!

ps. yay shopping! have fun!

Post # 10
7429 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2009

Happy birthday!!

Trust me, I know all about not getting attention on your birthday – its the story of my life!  My bday is 12/21..that’s right, 4 days before Xmas. Luckily, my mom’s is 12/23 so she totally understands and tried to make sure that they made my bday special and separate from xmas – people think that just because its right by xmas they only have to get just one present which is totally unfair.  Well I’ve made it known to my Fiance and BFF that since I was 13 I haven’t really had anything special for my bday and it kinda bummed me out. This past year since I was hitting the big 25 and they both got special gifts for their 25’s (we went sky diving for FI’s 25th, had a huge party at our house on the deck with swimming and a great turnout for BFF’s 25th) they planned me a big surprise party complete with a summer theme right in the middle of winter! I was totally surprised, since its so close to xmas they said they were texting back and forth about my xmas presents and I really had no clue. 

Anywho, just wanted to let you know your not alone, but I believe that by making it known you could be in for quite a surprise without realizing it

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