(Closed) biting while nursing, DH doesn’t get it

posted 7 years ago in Babies
Post # 3
Member
7293 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2011

Aww I’m so sorry, what a frustrating predicament! It really doesn’ help the morale that Darling Husband is being odd and really shouldn’t do anything but support because he is not the guy providing the meals.

I don’t have many Boyfriend or Best Friend recommendations, but I would recommend talking to Darling Husband about how you feel and the reality of the situation. You don’t want every time you feed becoming a reminder of the hurt feelings regarding Darling Husband.

Post # 4
Member
2142 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

aw. I’m so sorry. I haven’t been through this -yet- so I can’t help. Hopefully the class will be able to offer some advice.

And I agree, talking to your husband about how he made you feel is definitely in order. He probably did not realize he hurt you. 🙁

Post # 5
Member
2095 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

Please look through some of teh posts on here about Boyfriend or Best Friend. I can;t remember who it was but they were having issues with biting while nursing and the ladies here gave some excellent advice. Look around the site a bit and see what others have gone through. That might help! I think the most common thing is to pull the baby in closer when they start to bite or flick them on the nose.

As for Darling Husband tell him he needs to stand behind you not add more stress at a stressful time! Ask him if he would like to be bit in a soft spot to see how it feels and then come talk to you about it….lol. Seriously though, you need to make him understand that this is not comfortable for you and he needs to understand that this will be an adjustment phase.

Post # 6
Member
1763 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

You need to walk up to Darling Husband and bite his nipple:)

I had the same problem and would stop nursing when Dirty Delete did it. Then re-start a few miuntes later. Eventually it did get better. Going to the LL meeting is a great idea!

Post # 7
Member
1145 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2000

Ok! I’m with you. My baby is 8 months and just started cutting teeth this a few weeks ago. She has bit me a handful of times and it was happening more often this past week.  It was the last straw when she bit me and laughed like she was playing after I yelled OUCH. It seriously hurt I almost lost it!!  I’ve been controlling my emotions and persisting because I really want to make it to one year (personal commitment) breastfeeding so I reached out. My friend told me what worked with her (told to her by another great 3 time mom) was flicking. She only had to do it twice and he stopped. So in my desperation, yesterday  I flicked her ever so gently on the cheek near her mouth,  a fly wouldn’t have flinched, but she hasn’t done it since. Today, she jumped off and started playing instead of playing with my nipple by biting. I’m hoping it’s a turnaround. I’m prepared to try the flick a few more times. 

(I tried the pulling closer thing a few months ago but it’s not working anymore.)

Post # 8
Member
5823 posts
Bee Keeper

I’ve heard of pinching the nose to make them open their mouth to breath, but I don’t know about that.  🙁  Dirty Delete never bit me, so I’m no help but I hope your LLL meeting goes well and offers you lots of insight!

Post # 9
Member
801 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2008

I’m so sorry!  DS cut his first tooth a few weeks ago and no biting yet so I don’t have any hands on experience to offer (just an incredibly fussy baby).  You said you are already trying kellymom’s advice and that is what I’d suggest – stop the nursing suggestion and give it 5 minutes or so, then try again. 

I’d defintely try to get my thoughts together and talk to my husband if he had a similar reaction that you descirbed with your husband.  I’d try to explain to him that his reaction was very hurtful and that he needed to support me, not make me feel worse. 

Post # 11
Member
3226 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

Ugh, I have no experience, but I cringe just thinking about it. Ugh!

Post # 12
Member
2095 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

Maybe he is projecting his own insecurities on you. If this is a first child for both of you then maybe you need to read some material about what can/can’t affect your young child. Has he been hovering a lot lately? Maybe he is hearing from family members that the baby is not gaining enough or something. Talking things out rationally is what is needed here. Tell him your concerns and let him tell you yours. Try to keep a cool head, which is not always so easy.

I will never forget when my son was an infant and my grandafther flipped out on myself, my mom, and my grandmother for not feeding him right since he was crying and took it over himself. We still laugh aobut it to this day. He heard the baby crying and wanted to fix it. We all jsut stood there and let, it made him feel better. Sometimes you have to stand back and let them do their thing.

Post # 13
Member
7082 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: July 2009

We had some biting issues.  You just have to be very consistent.  Say “No”, delatch them immediately (some people say push them into the breast, but this just freaked our daughter out in a bad way) and then wait a few minutes before you feed them again.

Cecilia always got hysterical when we took the boob away, but on the flip side, it only took 4 or 5 times before she figured out to never bite again!

Post # 14
Member
567 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2010 - MacLean Park

So I’m no help with the biting, as my LO is only 6 weeks old, but what the hell is your husband thinking? Criticizing you on your breastfeeding?!? Um…last time I checked, he’s not whipping out his engorged, swollen, aching breasts to a mouth full of biting teeth. Even though my daughter doesn’t have any yet, she still gums my nipple around by grinding her jaw back and forth over it, and I totally yell when she does that. I mean, hell, it HURTS! I don’t yell at her, it’s more like an “AH!!” out loud. But she did eventually stop doing it, so perhaps I startled it out of her 😉

While I have more of the “Tell your hubs to STFU” mentality, it seems like you are in a much less-confrontational, calmer household. Perhaps you can sit your Darling Husband down and give him a nice informative talking-to. That hey, these are your boobs, with your nipples cracking/bleeding/pulling and he will never understand that feeling. So he needs to butt the hell out when it comes to telling you how to breastfeed. That’s what the LLL, or your mom, best girlfriend, and pediatrician are for. Tell him once he becomes a lactation specialist he can put in his two cents. Until then, YOU are the one who decides how your baby eats, whether it’s on the boob, or in the bottle. Trust me, you can still bond with a bottle. And your nipples will thank you!!

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