- mrstilly
- 9 years ago
- Wedding: May 2010
DS got his first tooth about 3 weeks ago and the 2nd followed about a week later. Teething wasn’t a big deal for him. A little extra chewing on things, but we didn’t really know he was teething until after the 1st one popped through.
Nursing has been fine until last night. DS bit down hard while nursing. It was a night time feeding before bed. He went on to nurse fine, but the same thing happened again around 4am, and again around 10. Tonight I tried to nurse him a few times, and he kept biting me. He usually bites before moving his tongue forward to latch on. The one time I knew he was hungry but the second time he might have been not hungry or distracted. We’ve been dealing with distractions while nursing, since he’ll whip his head around over and over, but never with teeth.
Tonight he bit me so hard he broke the skin. Then of course while getting up the bottle of breast milk spills and starts leaking out. I set DS down in his exersaucer so I can clean up and take a breather. He’s crying/fussing, but he’s fine.
DH comes up from the basement and I explain what happened and why I’m so frustrated and upset. Instead of having any sympathy or understanding, he’s worrying about DS and if I’m going to give him a bottle now or what. Later he was standing holding DS and I came up to them and said (in a nice voice) “please don’t bite mommy anymore”. DH just looks at me and tells me that I can’t talk to DS or look at him so mad because he can feel my anger.
I’m not mad at DS. I don’t blame him. I know he’s just a baby. When he bites, my first reaction tends to be to yell and pull away, but I’m trying not to. But I’m struggling with doubts about my ability to feed my child through this. Now that I’m expecting him to bite, I’m so tense that i won’t let down very easily, making everything worse. I can’t pump enough in a day to provide all he eats, and the very thought of giving him bottles of breast milk instead of nursing makes me so sad. I know others have made it through hard times nursing, but we’ve had a pretty easy time of things and I don’t know about my ability to make it through the pain of him biting me. His teeth are so sharp. He’s just 6 months old, but huge and strong for his age. My emotions are on overdrive and I’m so upset that DH took such an offensive stance, as though I am not a good mom, instead of trying to reassure me or sympathize with everything I’m going through.
There is a LLL meeting Wednesday, so I’m going to go. I have the day off from work because it is his 6 month well visit. I’m trying to use some of the tips on the Kellymom.com website and other posts here about nursing a biter. I didn’t even nurse him to sleep tonight like I have every single night of his life so far – he got a bottle of EBM.
I’ve always seen myself as someone nursing to at least a year, and hopefully beyond. I feel so guilty for yelling when DS first bites me, uncertain of my ability to continue to nurse him, weak for not being able to handle the pain, inept for not being better able to tell why he is biting instead of latching on, and so angry and sad that DH isn’t offering me more support. When it seems like he is doubtful or questioning my parenting, it makes me feel so awful.