(Closed) Bleachers in the delivery room

posted 8 years ago in Babies
Post # 3
Member
2562 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2010

I will only have me, my fiance and possibly a close nurse friend to act as an advocate/doula. I don’t think I would feel comfortable even having my own mom there seeing all of my bits – no thanks!

Post # 4
Member
651 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

i’m not even pregnant or ttc, but that is just too many people in the room to have all the grandparents.  if and when I ever get pregnant the only person in the room would be Fiance.  and my mom is squeamish about that stuff anyway so I think she’d rather just be there when everything is all cleaned up.

Post # 5
Member
447 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2009

It will only be my husband in the delivery room. I’m not comfortable with anybody else being in there.

Post # 6
Member
1675 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

Not married or TTC yet, but The Guy and I have discussed this a lot. In the delivery room: The Guy, my mum, my midwife and any additional required medical personnel. Not my dad, not my stepmum and not my stepdad. To be honest, I don’t care if this causes drama (it won’t, my family is super laid back), this is an extremely personal decision and everyone has to do what is right for them 🙂

Post # 7
Member
2641 posts
Sugar bee

I only had my husband (and of course the docs and nurses.)  I think it’s unreasonable for so many ppl to insist that having an army in there is the norm.  No, I didn’t even have my own mom.  Sorry, the last time my mom saw my crotchetorial area, it didn’t need shaving.  And you know what, she was probably relieved.  But I certainly don’t think grandfathers have any right to expect to be in the room.

Don’t get me wrong.  If gals want their moms in there, fine.  If the dad isn’t available and they want a friend or whomever, great. 

Post # 8
Member
1518 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

Husband and Mother ONLY

Post # 9
Member
2867 posts
Sugar bee

I think it’s unreasonable to expect anyone but the Father to be in the room!  For me (not TTC yet), I will only want my hubby.  I don’t want visitors for a couple of weeks after either, prime baby bonding time for me and I feel like I’d have to entertain rather than rest and enjoy my little one.  The only person I’ll consider visiting immediately is my Future Mother-In-Law (I don’t have a mother), and only her..not Future Father-In-Law. 

Post # 10
Member
3363 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2009

Def the husband, and maybe my mom.  I haven’t really decided on that.  She has been there through most of my medical procedures, and she gave birth 4 times…but I dunno…

She doesn’t think she should be in there, so she won’t be offended. 

Post # 11
Member
1104 posts
Bumble bee

I will only have Darling Husband in there with me, not that we are close to TTC but we have discussed this before. I have heard of the trend to have every man woman and their dog in the room and I don’t like it. To me it is a moment to share with Darling Husband. Of course I hope my parents, siblings, etc will be nearby so they can come and visit pretty quickly. I have announced this to my family in the past and they were relieved, I don’t think either of my parents had any interest being present either! My Mother-In-Law has been a “birth coach” for her neice twice and I just hope she doesn’t expect to be in the room with us. When I was born there was about 30 med students watching, mum didn’t even realise until she heard applause 🙂

Post # 13
Member
2867 posts
Sugar bee

Even if it’s being “selfish”, you have that right because you and your partner are the parents.  I’m very adamant and independent, and have expressed this to Fiance since his mother loves to “help”.  So don’t feel guilty, shrug them off.  It’s you and your partner’s choice. 🙂

Post # 14
Member
11325 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: February 2011

I definitely assume that I will have my (future) husband and my mom in the room with me. I’ll probably have as many as are allowed. I would be ok with my fi’s mom (although she lives in NY so i’m sure she wouldn’t be there), but I don’t think I’d be okay with fi’s dad or step mom. his dad, that would just be WEIRD and while i like his step mom i just feel like i wouldn’t want her there. as for my dad… meh. I would definitely ask him to stay by my head if he was in there but i wouldn’t be that weirded out by it. I would feel kind of weird about him being out in the waiting room alone if my mom was in the room with me (I don’t foresee my fi’s family being there bc they all live far away and i don’t think i’d want my friends there during the actual birth). if my bff/moh lived locally I’d want her there but she lives 9 hrs away so that won’t happen!

Post # 15
Member
2083 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2010

Yep, I think you’re being reasonable! When it comes time, I ONLY want my husband in there. I wouldn’t feel comfortable having all my family in there, but I also want it to be just an experience that me and my husband have together.

Post # 16
Member
581 posts
Busy bee

You get to make the call when the time comes.  You don’t need to invite anyone but those you really want.  I will tell you that modesty goes out the window when the time comes.  I had my first son at the shift change, and we had about ten people in the room.  Crazy business!  I didn’t care who saw at that point, just that I wanted that little sweetie out!  But my husband and I wanted it to be just the two of us.  We called family after each of our sons had arrived.  As long as your wishes are followed, that is what matters.

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