Post # 1
We already had our big, beautiful church wedding with a full mass a month ago. It was GREAT! BUT, all of my family lives out of state, in California, and nearly all of my relatives were unable to attend. So, we’re going to have a hometown reception in California, and we’re still trying to figure that out– no dates or anything yet, but it will be on the beach this summer/early fall. We are considering a blessing or something by a priest as part of the event, but we don’t really know what from the marriage ceremony would be included, if anything. We would want it to be meaningful and God-filled, but maybe last 10-15 minutes since it’s not the “real thing.”
SO— my questions are 1. What do you think would be included?/What would the priest be willing to do that would still be kosher to the church? and 2. Do you think we should do this at all? Would it be better to keep it simple and just have a party where family and friends eat and visit with each other? (No formal ceremony or events, etc.) In other words, some of my family might like it, but I’m not sure so many of them will care enough to make a difference.
Post # 3
since you’re already married in the catholic church i have no idea if a priest would do that. i say ask one of the local parishes in california and see what they say. my only question is what you are hoping the priest will do in 10-15 minutes since it won’t be a mass or liturgy of the word? you might be better off finding a general minister.
as to your second question it’s really up to you and how you think the family in california will feel. personally since you already had the ceremony i’d skip it and just do a second mini reception/congratulations party. less to organize and probably cheaper in the long run.
Post # 4
Oh I dunno, in my experience, priests love blessing things. Especially if you have a family friend who is a priest. I mean, it’s never not kosher to pray, right? I know Mormons do ring ceremonies after the weddings, where they don’t say vows but say something about how much they love each other, sometimes a minister speaks and says a prayer. You could do something like that.
Were you going to dress up again?
Post # 5
I agree with jedeve that in general priests love blessing things! My concerns are more logistical: Do you have a relationship with a priest in California or would you be contacting someone new? The only trouble I can imagine is that priests are usually really busy and getting a priest you don’t know to do a blessing ceremony might be more difficult than getting one to do a marriage ceremony, because they might see it as less important or superfluous since you’re already married.
From a guest’s point of view, would this involve two sites, and how far apart would they be? As a guest I would prefer just one location if the blessing ceremony is going to be so short. It may be easier to have a blessing ceremony in the location of your reception and to have a family member or friend officiate if you can’t get a priest to do it.
Post # 6
Thanks for the ideas, and being a sounding board here!!! So, here’s my thought process at the moment/answers to your questions:
- I’m thinking just a blessing sort of thing… not a full liturgy or anything that can’t happen outside of a church. Maybe a reading from our wedding ceremony followed by a prayer of blessing from the priest. I can’t figure out anything else that would make sense being added.
- My family has a connection with a couple of priests who would likely do something like this, but I work for a church and I know how over-stretched clergy are so part of me is wondering — wow, do I REALLY want to ask a priest to take time for little ol’ me and my husband for a simple little blessing? Guess I could take the “ask and see what happens” route on that.
- While it would be lovely to do this in a church, I think we’ll try to do this at the hometown reception location– which is either going to be on the beach or at my dad’s home in the backyard. Fingers crossed that the beach works out!
- It’s going to be a pretty casual event. I’ll wear a white sundress (rehearsal dress, actually). My husband will wear khakis and a linen shirt. No flowers, but leis for me and the hubs; possiblly parents and other VIPs too. Good Mexican food or BBQ. Overall a picnic kind of vibe. The current day we’re eyeing is Labor Day weekend, so it makes sense, right?
So the update is that the hubs and I DO want to include something with the priest, but the what is the sticking point. Anything to add beyond a reading and a prayer by the priest? I can’t think of any other parts from our wedding ceremony that would make sense to throw in or ask the priest to include.
Post # 7
If you have a reading and have it look anything like the ceremony, than you’re going to have issues with confusing this with the liturgy. Most priests will be reluctant to do that for a number of reasons. Either they think the liturgy is being demeaned or they’re just so busy actually administering the sacraments, that it really is too much to ask of them. It would make sense if you had a close relative who was a priest that was going to be there anyway give you a non-formal out of the blue blessing that takes 10 seconds.
I’d say have pictures out from your ceremony and really make it a reception.
Post # 8
You could also call it a ‘renewal of the vows’ and do quite a bit (almost a re-enactment of the ceremony)