(Closed) BM asked if my ring is real

posted 6 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 3
Member
793 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

I’ve never had that happen to be, but I think what you said about how it’s the sentiment behind it that matters was great. I think what she did after must have been super awkward for you and everyone else. It doesn’t matter whether or not her ring is “real” but the fact that she kept saying something would definitely have made me feel uncomfortable!

Post # 3
Member
2725 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: November 2011

Sounds like she’s very self conscious about her CZ. I wouldn’t worry about it. It just like when you have that friend who thinks she’s fat (and she’s not) and you constantly have to reassure her….

Post # 4
Member
9824 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper

I don’t think there is really any particular way to “handle” it. If she’s insecure about her ring that’s her subject to tackle.

Post # 5
Member
331 posts
Helper bee

To me, it sounds like your friend is A) resentful her guy didn’t get her what she wanted (whether it be a diamond, other gem, or larger CZ) OR B) she’s insecure and is trying to overcompensate out of her own shame. Without knowing the situation, I’d feel awful for her FI; I take publicly dogging/air out issues as a huge sign of disrespect. Whether it’s wrong or right, the stigma of a man’s pride wrapped up in wanting the nicest thing (ie, thing she’s happiest with) for his lady is most (nearly) evident in an engagement ring; I can only imagine what he’d feel if he knew she were saying such things.

Of course, most people would never dare ask if it were real but someone once said here that if they ask if it’s real, you could reply with, “Nope, it’s a figment of your imagination”. Or something to that respect. I’d think it’d shut most people right up.

 

 

Post # 6
Member
3175 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

I don’t think there’s really any way to “handle” the situation. She’s clearly self-conscious & trying to over compensate & I think saying something will just make her feel worse.

Post # 7
Member
2073 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

I think you handled the situation very gracefuly.  I wouldn’t worry too much about it, especially since you mentioned that she is a good friend.  Just change the subject if it comes up again or mention to her that it makes you uncomfortable to discuss money or whatnot.  

Post # 9
Member
1572 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2009

never happened to me in that way…but a coworker once sad something about “must be nice with a rock that big”…my ring isn’t big, its normal which made it even more awkward.

I do know someone that wears a CZ on purpose and not her diamond cause she like the style more. 

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