Post # 1
We are having a small ceremony, and a small wedding party. I asked my sister to be Maid/Matron of Honor, and my Future Sister-In-Law to be a Bridesmaid or Best Man. Fiance has his brother and BIL on his side – although he considers them both his Bridesmaid or Best Man since he’s closer to the BIL but knew it would make sense to have his brother as the Bridesmaid or Best Man, and BIL as the Groomsmen. Plus, his mom thought it would best to label them that way so no one gets offended – like his SIL (long story…). I told him, they can be whatever he wants but in the program/website will be listed as such.
Well, we were over at his sister’s house Sunday night, and she made a comment to her SIL who was in town (we all went to a concert) about how she’s just a Bridesmaid or Best Man and how my sister introduced herself as the Maid/Matron of Honor at my shower the day before (which she should have, since she sent the invites and some people had never met her). She went on about how her husband is a joint Bridesmaid or Best Man so she could be a Maid/Matron of Honor as well. She was being pretty snotty about it, and so it kind of hit me the wrong way. However, I just sat there and let her vent to whoever was listening as I didn’t want to cause any unnecessary drama. I don’t know why she brought it up now, as we’re 45 days away, but I was not impresessed with her behavior.
I’ve been a very easy going bride – let them pick whatever dress they want, whatever shoes, haven’t asked for much help, etc. I suppose I could have asked her to be my M(atron)OH, but my sister was the only Maid/Matron of Honor that I wanted and that thought never crossed my mind. Unless she was upset that my sister didn’t include her much into the planning of my shower/bachelorette party – which I think she should have – but she wanted to do it on her own.
Just needed to vent my thoughts!
Post # 2
- Wedding: October 2015 - Hidden Acres
Sounds like your SIL is either just a being a brat, or perhaps she feels a little left out since everyone else has an ‘honor’ title. Has she always acted in dramatic fashion or is this a one-time thing? I agree that I wouldn’t have been impressed with her behavior that close to the wedding either. Some things you need to just need to put your big girl panties on and deal with.
I have several best friends (from childhood, HS, and college) that I’ve asked to be in my wedding but they’ve known from the word “go” that my sister was going to be my Matron OH and the rest of them would be Bridesmaid or Best Man. If they have an issue with it, they’ve wisely kept it to themselves. I have zero tolerance for grown women acting like “how come SHE gets to be the XYZ and *I* have to be a lowly 123.”
Post # 3
JessSC79: I really do think she was being a brat (and we’re in our 30’s!). She can be pretty dramatic on stuff, but it’s hit or miss. However, she’ll judge someone like no tomorrow on something they may do/say, but then goes and does something similar and it’s not big deal. So – that’s just her.
All of my friends knew we were having a small wedding party, so no one has said anything to me about not being included (or at least to my face, I guess). They know we wanted small, so this works for us.
Post # 4
- Wedding: October 2015 - Hidden Acres
Gotta love bratty 30-somethings…we outgrew the playground a LONG time ago…or at least we should have! If everyone knew you were having a small bridal party, then she shouldn’t be saying anything. She should be happy to be there and support you, not pout because she doesn’t have an official job title. If she’s so unhappy you could just tell her you don’t need her.
Post # 5
That is so stupid of her- I mean really, who cares? It’s your sister that is MOH- not some random person off the street!
Post # 6
Kacie209: Sounds like she is not mature enough to be a Bridesmaid or Best Man, much less an Maid/Matron of Honor. It was inappropriate of her to be venting about this to other people, and in your company. If she can’t accept that your sister is closer to you than she is, this girl has problems.
Post # 7
She’s the same person who is upset that her husband (ya know, a GM) is going out of town next weekend for FI’s bachelor party. It’s been planned for quite some time, too. She’s barely allows her husband to do anything by himself (like meet friends for drinks, etc) cos god forbid she has to watch her 2 kids (5 and 2) by herself… but yet, she can go out whenever and leave him alone with the kids (he really doesn’t have a problem watching them by himself). Such a double standard. So, usually Fiance and I go over there and help – which means that we watch the kids really. I know for a fact we won’t get their help when we eventually have kids – and Fiance agrees.
We get along and I do like her, but some things just don’t make sense. I’m a pretty level headed person (people I work with love that about me)… so I don’t get stirred up too much by some people’s actions.
Post # 8
Just ignore it. It was impolite of her to bring it up.
Post # 9
Kacie209: It’s your freaking sister!! What a brat. I had a similar situation, but all of my bridal party were friends – don’t have any sisters. One Bridesmaid or Best Man thought she should be Maid/Matron of Honor and called me out on it. Awkward to say the least.