Post # 46
It’s 9 months away so don’t start losing your cool yet. While I agree that it’s not your place to demand she look a certain way for the wedding, I don’t see any harm in asking nonchalantly MUCH closer to the date if she plans to stay bright or go more natural for the wedding. I wouldn’t ask her to change it though.<br /><br />I see where you’re coming from, worried she’ll stick out and look like Barney the Dinosaur and be a sore thumb, but don’t worry too much. She’s there to support you, and I doubt no matter what hair she has that she’ll take any attention off of you.
Post # 47
Thanks everyone. I’m not going to say anything to her, and I really think she’ll dye it back before then anyway. I really hate to say this and sound like an even bigger bitch than many of you already think I am, but it truly does not look good. I’ve seen different colored hair that, although not my style, was something I could genuinely admire and this is not it. Anyway, my point is I think she’ll come to the conclusion to dye it back on her own.
I could maybe understand some of the animosity toward me if I had flipped out on her (although still, why so much hate toward a stranger on the internet?). Instead, I came to what I thought would be a safe place to have a wedding-related freakout, started off by saying that this far in advance it might not be an issue, asked for advice on how to handle it, and specifically asked for people to be nice. I got called a bridezilla, ridiculous, self-centered, and controlling. People were actually talking shit about me to each other right there in the open. I suppose anonymity is a true revealer of character. I realized after looking back over the posts that the majority were actually helpful and kind, but those unnecessarily rude ones stood out. If this is what I can expect from the Bee, it isn’t a community I want to be a part of.
If anyone can tell me how to close this thread to new comments, I would really appreciate it.
Post # 48
I don’t care for unnatural hair colors and tattoos, but if I had asked a friend of mine to be in my wedding, it is to have her there with me, not to dictate what she can or cannot do with her own body. Privately I’d dislike it, maybe even a lot, but I would never say a word to her unless she brought it up and asked me my preference.
Post # 49
Alexsquared — To be honest, I’d probably do a double-take myself, and I spent almost all of my late teens and almost all of my 20s dying my hair every color I could get my hands on! With that said, feel your feelings — AUGH MY WEDDING PHOTOS! — and then keep those feelings to yourself. It is her hair, after all. If, closer to the day (two months out, maybe?), she’s still sporting her Manic Panic ‘do, maybe you could have a conversation.
Oh!! I just read your post up above. I HARDLY think this qualifies as a ‘bridezilla’ moment — There is a big difference between honey-brown highlights and crayon-box colors. You’re not a bitch, you’re a bride. You’re spending (you, your family, whomever) lots of money to celebrate your love with your Fiance and YOU can have mini-freakouts ALL YOU DARN WELL PLEASE. Heck, Fiance and I argued last Friday about what tofu dish to serve to the FOUR VEGETARIANS at our wedding (I’ll just go over here and worry about the other 96 guests!).
I’ve got tattoos, and although my hair is pretty normal now (teaching will do that to you!), my girls range in style and color throughout the year. Oddly enough, they’re all brunettes now and it makes me a little uncomfortable — I’m the last blonde standing. 🙂 I’m pretty sure I’ll be the only one with visible tattoos too — that is, if you can look under my hair and veil.
Good luck, lady! You’ll get through this. xo.
Post # 50
It’s nine months away, don’t bother bring it up until 1-2 weeks before the wedding. She could change her hair 3 more times in 9 months, don’t get too worked up about it.
Post # 51
OP, to me it read like your own personal little freak out. It’s not like you yelled at the bridesmaid and then came on here asking for validation that you did the right thing. I’m sure you didn’t pick any of your maids for their appearance. I’m sure you understand that they’re not little dress up dolls to make your photos pretty. There’s a big difference between hoping that everything looks like you imagined (you) and running around demanding that everyone bends to your whim (bridezilla). Just relax and carry on!