(Closed) Book church without the ring? What would you do?

posted 6 years ago in Waiting
Post # 3
4352 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

@blueberries123:  I would wait until you are engaged and be open to getting married after Sept. 2013.

Post # 4
556 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

Talk to your SO about it and see what he thinks first, and if he is on board, I would do it. After all, a ring is just a symbolic gesture, not the actual intention to marry, so if you’re just waiting on the material item, but you both know you want to get married on x date, I would snatch up your ceremony location.

Post # 5
1729 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

If there’s not a downpayment, why not go ahead and book to hold the date…as long as your SO is onboard.

Post # 6
1357 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

If you and your fiance-to-be have discussed the wedding and are both sure you want to get married in September 2013, book the church. The only reasons not to would be if you’re not sure he’s on the same page or if you’re keeping your engagement discrete until the ring comes (assuming your family attends the same church and may find out from your pastor that you’ve booked a date).

Post # 7
6581 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: September 2012

Is the ring currently being made? If so, I would talk with your SO and make sure he is 100% on board and ready to propose. If he is, go in there and see what they have to say. I wouldn’t worry about the ring – for all they know you’re having it resized. 😉

However, if you guys are just in the “we want to get married next year” stage and you have no clue when the proposal is coming, I’d wait. 

Post # 8
2446 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: April 2018

It depends entirely on what your SO is comfortable with. If he’s okay with getting married in September, the two of you should go reserve the space.

Post # 9
1202 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

We are booking our venue without a ring for the same reason; our ring is not finished getting fixed. But I know he’s planning to propose on sunday. We bought a temporary ring. But either way, we were booking our venue with or without the ring.  If you are 100% positive that is the day and you are getting engaged, then I say book it!

Post # 10
7560 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: January 2013

I would wait until you’re engaged. You can always get married a little later or at a different place. You can not un-plan a wedding without some serious stress and monetary loss. 

Post # 12
1979 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: November 2014

I would talk to SO about it- explain that thebest venues book very early1-2 years ahead. Discuss the church with him and you should both decide if this is where you want to get married.  I’m guessing from your post that this IS the place!  If this is where you two want to get married say- we can book the church now for September 2013 or we can wait and get married later. You two should discuss whether sept 2013 is THE date and whether either of you want to get married later. Chances are, he’s waited long enough and he won’t want to push it back- good luck!

Post # 13
169 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: August 2000

As long as he’s agreeable, I don’t see why you guys can’t book anything you want. I wouldn’t do it without him being 100% in but if he is, go for it.

Despite what some people might believe, you can be engaged and planning a wedding without a ring. An engagement is the actual agreement to be married (which it sounds like you guys have). A ring is just a public symbol of that agreement.

Post # 14
1979 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: November 2014

@kybride:  Definitely! A couple is engaged when they decide they are engaged.  If you don’t think you are engaged until your SO asks you and puts a ring on your finger then you aren’t. If you two discuss everything and mutually decide you are indeed engaged then you are- tada! Good luck OP- just do what you and SO decide feels right for you!

Post # 15
1227 posts
Bumble bee

@kybride:  +1

I know several people who never bothered with an engagement ring. They were no less engaged than those who did.

There’s something about the prevailing thought that unless you have a ring, you are not engaged that I find sad.  When the symbol comes to have more meaning or importance than that which it symbolises. 🙁


To the OP, if you have both discussed getting married in Sept 2013, then go book the church.

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