(Closed) booking the venue before the official ‘proposal’?

posted 10 years ago in Waiting
Post # 3
2560 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

@treacle:  I think that if it’s ok with your SO (he wants that venue and that date, too) and you NEED to book it this early to get it, I don’t see why not. The only case where that’s  bad bad news to me is if you didn’t talk to your SO about it.  Guys don’t always realize you gotta propose 1-2 years before you want to get married if you want the venues and vendors you want!

Post # 5
632 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

@treacle:  Congrats on having a concrete timeline!  I’m waiting without a clear timeline (but I think within the next year I’ll be engaged), so I have felt a little crazy keeping a scrapbook of wedding things – I have ideas for STDs, invites, dresses, etc!!!  I haven’t put anything on pinterest because I have friends and family that follow me there and they don’t need to know how I’ve been obsessing over wedding details already.  Thank goodness for weddingbee!

I’m not making any decisions of course – but I thought it wouldn’t hurt to have things narrowed down a bit.   My SO has said he doesn’t want a long engagement but he does want a destination wedding…which means once a ring is on my finger we would need to hit the ground running. 

Post # 6
466 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2017 - Vegas Wedings

In you case, DO IT!! Why not? Your man doesnt feel pressure and it will make you lives easier. No one except your BFF and bf need to know till you 2 are officially engaged to be married.


Post # 7
121 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: April 2012 - Padua Hills Theater

When I saw the title of this post I imedietly thought about Monica from friends. I say book it. Maybe he says he’s six months away from proposing because he wants to suprise you? Either way start planning now! I have been telling all my girl friends, I know it sounds strange but there is nothing wrong with getting some ideas before you have a ring. Your engaged period flys by so fast! I wish I had done more research before getting engaged! 

Post # 8
1467 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

I don’t think there’s anything wrong with that…. venues book fast, especially in the on-months for weddings! You did a smart thing. 

Post # 9
507 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

I got engaged late December, and immediately afterward started looking for a venue for my April 2013 wedding.  To my surprise, several of my favorite places that I’d seen online had already been booked out all the way through December 2013. That is almost two years in advance – and considering the fact that most people are only engaged for about a year, I guess that means a a lot of people must be securing venues before they’re actually engaged. Honestly, I wish I had thought of that … so I’d say go ahead! 

Post # 10
49 posts
  • Wedding: September 2012

Just book it if it’s still open – I totally agree with love108 in that guys tend to not realize they need to propose way in advance in order to get all the details nailed down.  My SO/DF keeps apologizing for taking so long (bc the MUA’s that I wanted were already booked by the time I inquired about them).

IMO if your SO already agreed to a potential date, you guys are engaged already.  You’re only waiting for the “official” proposal (and I put this in quotes because while it’s important because it’s what people will want to hear about, it doesn’t signify much in your engagement other than the exchange of a piece of jewelry).  We booked our venue before I got my ring.

Post # 11
946 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: April 2014

As long as your SO is on board I say plan as much as you want!  I myself have been thinking about contact my dream venue to get an idea of how far in advance they fill up.  I’ve still got about 1 year till the proposal, another till the wedding (or at least that’s the plan), but if it’s the kind of place that books over a year in advance then that might change a few things!

Post # 12
48 posts

I’m in the exact same situation. My SO and I booked our venue 4 months ago. He is paying for the ring in cash and needed a few more months until it was paid off. So we knew our date and have told family and very close friends. I do know that he picked the ring up yesterday — paid in full — and I am expecting an “official” proposal in the next week or two. I am SOO excited to finally announce it to the world!

Do you think your family would think it is weird? Mine didn’t. My mom has been so excited to help me plan everything — we have even booked our photographer and DJ. You can be engaged without having the ring. I know it isn’t the traditional idea, but don’t let this stop you from sharing the wonderful news with people you love. I would just hold off on making an official announcement until he does propose and you have the ring.

Post # 13
2203 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

You guys, for all intents and purposes, are already engaged. Engaged doesn’t = ring. I guess I find it strange to already have a plan, a date and a venue, that he knows about and agrees with, but he is waiting to give you the ring. Anyways that aside I’d go ahead and book since things are set in stone already. 

Post # 15
1103 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: April 2015

@treacle:  That makes sense to me. I’d just wait and tell everyone till after he does propose to you by actually asking. In the meantime, book the venue if you both are on board to do that. At least it’ll be one less thing for you to worry about when you get into full blown wedding planning.

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