boring receptions… leave early?

posted 6 years ago in Reception
Post # 32
Member
727 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

@Anna10-05-2014:  We always try to stay at least until the late lunch.  Then if we’re bored/tired/not feeling well, we will leave.  Around here, that seems to be the time when it’s considered appropriate to leave.  Even my grandparents will wait until then. 

The only time we left early (10:30) was because we had a 1.5hr drive home. 

We usually stay until the end and the DJ has packed up.  Lots of times we help clean up.

Post # 33
Member
98 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: November 2013

Sigh. This is a tough. Even if I am not enjoying myself at a wedding, I usually try to say until the end…For this reason, my Fiance and I are invited to a LOT of weddings because we have built up a reputation of being the “fun ones” at weddings. 

That being said, I once went to a wedding where I struggled VERY HARD to want to stay. 

It was one of my FI’s friends….We arrive and I was already feeling a bit apprehensive because I didn’t know anyone at this wedding, so naturally I wanted a drink. We walk into the hall and I look for the bar. Looking, looking, no where to be found. I was so mad my fiance did not tell me this was a dry wedding (I could have brought my flask!) 

So I thought, okay this won’t be all bad, I’ll just dance the night away. Look around, no DJ. Yup, no dancing either. So, I”m thinking to myself, what the heck are we going to do for the next 5 hours here?

We make it through dinner (which was awful btw. Consisted of some stale buns, overcooked chicken, lumpy mashed potatoes and corn.) and then they announce that there will be SLEIGH RIDES for the rest of the night. And when you’re done with your sleigh ride, you can come in for some hot chocolate and cookies. 

Oh yeah, sleigh rides sound great unless it’s like 25 below outside, you aren’t dressed appropriately because you’re assuming that you’ll be inside all night and you are allergic to horses!

I can honestly say it was the WORST wedding I have ever been to, and I wanted to leave right after dinner. 

Post # 34
Member
1408 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

Left early once because my boyfriend, now my husband, had recently had surgery and was in pain.

Post # 35
Member
4691 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: June 2013 - Upstate NY

#1 BOOZE!!!

Post # 36
Member
221 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: January 2014

I feel like I will be the granny at my own wedding, I am miserable if I am cold or if the loud music is bothering me. I can just picture myself striding over to the DJ and asking them to turn it down LOL!

For other weddings if I’m comfy and happy I love to dance and have a good time. For close friends/family I often stay to help clean up (and carry the Bride’s sister out to a waiting vehicle).

Post # 37
Member
2196 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: March 2014

@Anna10-05-2014:  oh lord, we had our friend’s wedding last weekend and, well, I hate speaking ill of a wedding but I was pratically ready to leave at 7 (although things did improve).

  • Cocktail reception, with nowhere near enough seating.
  • Venue was a historical barn in the middle of nowhere, an hour’s drive from the ceremony.  They had to bring EVERYTHING in themselves.
  • The poor grandparent/elderly types used the few seats available but had to co-opt other seats as “tables” due to the nature of the appetiser type food initially on offer.
  • When we arrived there was two antipasto buffet areas set up, but the plates were full dinner plate sized HEAVY crockery which made it really had to eat one handed – and there were no tables etc to stuff the dinner rolls (which were really too big to eat on their own).
  • Music was bad to non-existant from the start.
  • Started at 4 (should have started closer to six, given the cocktail setting, various other reasons)
  • Didn’t affect FH or I as we don’t drink, but they started running out of red wine at 5.
  • MC was a female Hitler.  Ordered/snapped at us in a really offputting and increasingly hilarious way.  But nothing from the speeches to the first dance really flowed, I think because it was a cocktail reception so no natural breaks.
  • As the night went on the music – from an iphone – was 90% NOW THAT”S WHAT I CALL MUSIC from the 90s.  S Club 7, Spice Girls, Five, Backstreet Boys.  The bride’s family were dancing away, the rest of us couldn’t believe it.
  • “Main course” was a woodfired pizza truck.  imagine pizza boxes being handed around, again I feel sorry for the oldies.
  • On the topic of feeling sorry for hte oldies – basic portaloos with minimal lighting and pump-action sink/flush etc.

At one point, one of our group went off with one of the others to have a manual transmission DRIVING LESSON.  Queue awkward silence when they’d been gone a while and the bride suggested a photo with her & the groom and the rest of our group (school buddies of the groom & partners).  Caroline was like “Where’s Mariel???” and we were like…. um….. yeah…. well……

Ugh, can you tell I needed to get that off my chest?  Again I feel really bad for being so critical, and things did get better and we didn’t leave early, but it was just a really awkward start.

Post # 38
Member
1612 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 2014

I will generally stay until pretty late to support the couple unless I’m sick or need to get up early the next day. Exception is when I go with my mother.  She’s in her 70s and really does not like going places where she doesn’t know a lot of people.  We stayed late at my cousin’s wedding a few years ago (her and her brother danced the younger crowd under table!) but left after the first dance at the other 2 weddings we went to that year.  The first one was a family wedding but everyone else she knew was leaving.  The second one was the son of one of her friends and they made a BIG BIG BIG mistake!  They had no seating chart!  As a result we were at a table all by ourselves and felt so out of place.  We left right after dinner and didn’t even wait for the dancing to start.

Post # 39
Member
1612 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 2014

I will generally stay until pretty late to support the couple unless I’m sick or need to get up early the next day. Exception is when I go with my mother.  She’s in her 70s and really does not like going places where she doesn’t know a lot of people.  We stayed late at my cousin’s wedding a few years ago (her and her brother danced the younger crowd under table!) but left after the first dance at the other 2 weddings we went to that year.  The first one was a family wedding but everyone else she knew was leaving.  The second one was the son of one of her friends and they made a BIG BIG BIG mistake!  They had no seating chart!  As a result we were at a table all by ourselves and felt so out of place.  We left right after dinner and didn’t even wait for the dancing to start.

Post # 40
Member
3195 posts
Sugar bee

I would leave early if a wedding started out 1.25 hours late while the guest were out in the sun, there was not enough food at cocktail hour and no drinks, no t enough food at the dinner, and the music was so loud during dinner that you had to shout to hear the person next to you. 

True story. Darling Husband and I left to go to a bar and get dinner and drinks. 

Post # 41
Member
1991 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

Ohh I hate leaving weddings early and EVEN MORE SO now that I had my own!

We had a yacht wedding so everyone was stuck on the boat with us for 4.5 hrs and I HOPE they enjoyed their time – there was a lot to see and do out there on the water anyway and with the open bar, plentiful food, candy bar, photo booth and lounge area if they tiredand dance floor for all, I’m pretty sure everyone enjoyed themselves!

BUT

We attended the wedding of one of our groomsmen the next weekend and it was so sad how many people left early…

They had a low budget affair and I can note why people left:
1- Food wasn’t great.  
2- The bar was not hosted.
3- The couple was not the dancing type so the dance floor was empty.
4- There wasn’t other entertainment options besides dancing.
5- It was on a Friday night so people might have been tired from their workday.

 Obviously we stayed til the end, but I just felt so bad for them!

The wedding started at 5PM and had their venue til midnight but everyone except a few from the bridal party and us was gone by like 8… and they were thanking all of us for staying when everyone had left.  I felt so bad for them and now I will NEVER leave a wedding early, no matter what!

Post # 42
Member
1150 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

We left a wedding on the earlier side this summer mostly because it was in a barn so it was hot and the mosquitoes were SO BAD.

Also, the bride and groom were shitfaced- the next time we saw the best man, he told us that they had to take the bride to the hospital for alcohol poisoning. 

ALCOHOL POISONING ON HER WEDDING NIGHT.

I’m glad we left early. In general, being physically uncomfortable is what would do it (hunger, temperature, bugs). If it was just kind of boring, I would probaby get another drink and drag Fiance out to the dance floor 🙂

Post # 43
Member
1152 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

I’ve only left a wedding “early” once (it was about an hour into the dancing so not THAT early).  We had just adopted our dog the previous weekend and he had already been home for about 7 hours alone, and we felt like we needed to get back to him around then.  We told the bride and groom the reason ahead of time, and they understood (though I’m sure they were a little disappointed).

Post # 45
Member
246 posts
Helper bee

@Anna10-05-2014:  I’d never leave a wedding early (unless something SUPER offensive happened, I can’t even imagine what right now!)- I’d stay till the very end so I could have a better story to tell afterwards ha!

Post # 46
Member
176 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

I feel bad saying this but Fiance and I actually went up to the hotel room early for FI’s sister’s wedding. We were in bed at 11:30 and so were the rest of the cousins/family. They have an ecclectic taste (cartoon theme songs made several apperances) in music and it was music that only they and their friends enjoyed so it kind of left everyone else out and no one was dancing. We will be having upbeat more mainstream music that most people will recognize and dance to at our wedding. I don’t want guests leaving early!

 

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