We’re also choosing a new last name (paperwork is already in process). For us, we got jammed in to a tight corner and a new name seemed to be the best way out. Here’s our long story =P
-FH was born with a hyphenated last name (mother+father’s last names). He’s encountered a lot of problems with paperwork, etc. with it, and wishes it was shorter.
-FH’s parents have since divorced (not amicably).
-FH and I want to share a last name (along with any possible kids).
-I don’t want to take two last names, when neither of them are mine. I don’t particularly want to keep mine, since I don’t have a great relationship with my dad.
So it would seem the easiest option would be to just choose one of FH’s last names and keep that, which would be fine with me, but his parents were both very adamant that FH did not choose the other person’s name over their own. Very, very adamant. And angry. Not good.
So then we tried looking at past last names in the family tree. Same problem. Can’t choose a name from the other person’s side of the family either.
So new name it is. Both of his parents would rather we took a new last name than the name of the other person. My parents sortof thought that I was going to change my name anyway, so they don’t seem to care, though they think it’s weird. I like this better anyway, since I never thought the whole woman-changes-her-name-but-guy-doesn’t thing was very fair.
We chose our name by using those baby name sites where you can search by meaning. So it has an important meaning to us, and some interesting classical relationships. And, google doesn’t show it to be anything else obvious either =)
As for our kids, they can change their name to whatever they want, since we’ve sworn to not give our kids the heartache that FH’s parents have given him.