(Closed) boudoir photography for the shy/self-conscious bride

posted 8 years ago in Photos/Videos
Post # 3
Member
3295 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

i am kinda of shy and selfconscious too…. but i have decided to do a shoot bc i know fi will love it. its a once in a lifetime thing so yea…. im gonna have a few drinks and relax and try to be seductive hehe!

Post # 4
Member
376 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

Same problem here…I read somewhere that it’s not how you look really, it’s how much you trust the photographer and how skillful they are at getting you at flattering angles, etc. Some people who don’t trust ANY photographer have done DIY boudoir shots (if you search on weddingbee there are a couple of threads).

Good luck you two!

Post # 5
Member
10851 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2010

I did one a couple weeks ago and haven’t gotten photos back yet, otherwise I’d share some. I was REALLY nervous going into it. I barely ever even put lingerie on for Fiance nevermind in front of complete stranger! I picked a female photographer since I knew that would make me more comfortable, plus she’s close to my age so that helped too. She touches up all the photos that go in the book and she said she wouldn’t do anything to my photos that she wouldn’t do for herself which I thought was fair. As far as the shoot went, she sort of eased me into it. So at first I was wearing a short skirt and a button down shirt tied in front, then one of FI’s shirts with panties/bra under, then panties/bra with some props like a veil, etc. Honestly, after about half an hour I didn’t care anymore and I’m really self conscious. I think I said something like along the lines of how nervous I was and she just looked at me and said “Don’t worry, I’ve seen it all” and then I realized it’s so true, she’s seen people way hotter than me, way worse than me. Her job is to be behind the camera and make it look awesome, not to judge my cellulite or stomach. I had an amazing time and I’m SO looking forward to getting my photos and giving them to FI!!!

And as an added element, my photographer doesn’t have a studio so normally the client rents a hotel room. I didn’t want to spring for that, so we did it in the middle of a farmer’s field in a dead end street! ACK! I’m STILL covered in bug bites! LOL! It made it an adventure for sure and a bit less nerve wracking.

Post # 7
Member
10851 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2010

@ChantelleyLace: That sounds like fun! Do you have any friends who might want to go with you and do a boudoir shoot too? It might make it less stressful for you.

Post # 8
Member
2588 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: February 2014

First of all: Men don’t really notice stretchmarks–I gained some weight and have a few, and was super self-conscious until I asked FH about them and he said (with complete honesty), “What stretch marks?” 🙂 I understand the self-consciousness, though!

Having a friend with would definitely help, and maybe if you went for a vintage pin-up vibe instead of outright showing-naughty-bits-sexy, you’d feel more comfortable. Also, the good old “laying on back, legs up against wall” pose is super-sexy and flattering.

Post # 10
Member
2588 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: February 2014

Very cool! 🙂 Frederick’s occasionally has some good, classy stuff, too. Vintage-themed boudoir is what I’m planning on as well, if I have the cash to do it when the date gets closer.

Post # 11
Member
1573 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2010

I did a boudoir session for my now husband.  I was really nervous too.  I think that the best thing to do is to clearly let your photographer know what you are interested in doing.  Look for pictures on line that are similar to what you’d want.  I wanted something more classy with implied sexiness. Nothing too naked or too revealing. I showed her some pictures that I liked and it went really well.  My pictures are so amazing. I felt so beautiful looking at them, which is an added perk to my husband loving them.

Here is a website that has great pics to pic from.

http://hauteboudoirphotography.com/

Here is my photographer and the inspiration for many of my pics. (That isn’t me though.)

http://marilynnakazato.com/blog/2010/02/09/and-her-she-is/

Post # 12
Member
12 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: May 2011

We are natural girls, in most of the cases.. So I think that our men love us, just as we are.. It is one time in our life… just do it, and have fun!! 🙂

Post # 13
Member
443 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

I am considering it too.  I never would have even thought about doing it myself, but my photog approached me (female) and asked me if I wanted to do a few pics before the ceremony. (its just the 2 of us so I will be alone while getting ready).  It won’t be a full on budoir session, I’ll probably use my wedding night lingerie and a couple of other things.  I am 44, have a pooch from 2 kids/cesereans and I wouldn’t even consider showing my stomach..not an option.  I’m too self conscious about it, as you are.  It will be covered up the whole time and she will use different angles etc to make sure I look my best.  I made sure she knew I wouldn’t go for anything to risque/trashy, but exactly as said above, implied sexiness.  I have been working out 6 days a wk since june anyway, but this really gives me more incentive!!

Post # 14
Member
34 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: March 2011

girl I feel the same way you do!! But you just have to be confidant with yourself and your body. Your future hubby already loves you for who you are and he already loves your body, so don’t worry about how he’ll respond, you know he’ll love it! The biggest obstacle you have to overcome is feeling comfortable enough in your skin and in your body to do it. I fee the same way, but I think I’m going to do it! If toning up a bit before the photos would make you feel better, then do it! It’s all about confidence and comfort, so do what you can to make yourself feel more comfortable about it. also, most photographers will work with you to make you feel the best and make you look the best on camera. 

Post # 15
Member
435 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2011

I would love to do this for Fiance, he would love it… I even have the outfits (corsets) I would wear.  I am very unhappy with my body.  I lost a lot of weight, but now have the hanging elephant looking skin from it.  I figure it’s all about the posing to hide what we dont like. Only thing that concerns me is, in ALL the boudoir photos I have seen, I have never seen a plus size girl…always average to thin sized girls.

Post # 16
Member
41 posts
Newbee

Boudoir photographers are used to working with everyone from shy to bold! Just let the photographer know in advance. We have a questionnaire that we send our clients a link to a few weeks in advance with several questions. This lets us know ahead of time what they want – and what they may have concerns about. It also allows you to think about the answers at your pace instead of trying to do it when the shoot is happening. The important part is to relax. A good photographer will walk you through the process and even start fully clothed if you like.

As for the stretch marks, no biggie. If you dont want them in the photos, just tell the photographer. They will edit them out. I have removed tattoos that were full back pieces at the request of clients.

Just pick a good photographer. They will work with you and you and your Fiance will be happy.

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