Post # 1
- Wedding: April 2016 - City, State
Okay so here’s the story. We bought a toy drum set for kids back over the summer for my nephew (he will be 2 in February), It was on clearance for $6, normally $30. My nephew LOVES music and things that make noise so I HAD to buy it for him. My thought was “great, that’s one person done that we have to buy for for Christmas.” Well, one day, my husband comes home from work with this battery operated ride on car for kids. He originally bought it for my niece (she’s 8) but when he got it home, I realized it was way too small for her. But it was only $15 and it was the perfect size for my nephew. Now he has two gifts.
What are we going to buy my niece? I asked my sister-in-law what my niece wanted, and she told me a specific Barbie. So I did buy the Barbie, but I still feel like it isn’t fair to my niece that my nephew has two gifts and one of them is kind of a “big” gift. I don’t want her to think we like/love my nephew more than her (there have been issues with her biological father’s side of the family saying this side of the family loves my nephew more than her).
We did spend the same amount of money on each child, but kids don’t really understand that. They see their brother got two gifts and she only got one. My initial idea was to try to find a cheap ride on car similar to the one we bought for my nephew, but those are expensive for her age/size.
Does anyone have any suggestions? I know it isn’t necessary to buy them things, but I want to, and like I said, I want it to be fair.
Post # 2
Why don’t you hold back on the drum kit until the next gift giving opportunity? Then you won’t have to worry about him ‘sizing out’ of the car, you’re saving yourself next time and already have something sorted.
Post # 3
I’d save one for his birthday in February.
Or I’d get another item to go with the Barbie doll. They have a Barbie car that you can usually get fairly cheap at Kohls or some additional Barbie clothes.
Post # 4
Does she like to craft? My neice is also 8, she loves crafting (also something I enjoy). I make her crafting kits. I print out age appropriate ones that I think she will like, gather the supplies (usually have most of them on hand or dollar store) put in a pretty bag or box and voila.
Post # 5
Maybe you could take her out to a movie or something? That will make her feel really special and you nephew is too young to know anything is happen to get jealous.
Post # 6
I would definitely save the drum set for his birthday when he can use it outside. I hope you ran this by his parents before you purchased it- a sure way to drive everyone in the house crazy.
Post # 7
A nice art kit with pastels, good quality colored pencils, paint and paper is a gift I frequently give.
By this age I don’t think size of the toy is necessarily correlated with the excitement factor.
Post # 8
Robot? Amazon has some really cool robots that kids can learn to program.
Post # 9
I literally can’t remember a single present I ever got as a kid so I think you’re sweating it unnecessarily imo.
I certainly was never ‘sizing up’ anyone else’s gifts and we often spent Christmas with extended family and church friends (aka large groups from a variety of backgrounds). Some kids got way nicer stuff than us I’m sure (we grew up pretty poor but my parents bent over backwards to send us to private school so I was always the one who didn’t have as nice stuff) but if anything, parents taught us to appreciate what you get and I learned the value of hard work and money at an early age. Sorry to rant, but pandering to a child’s material wants vs using it as a chance to teach values kinda irks me.
Post # 10
i think its sweet that you are concerned. i agree with pp who said to hold one gift back for another time that way each child opens one box. true they will be very different size boxes, but i think everyone would rather have what they want in a small box vs something random in a large box.
Post # 11
heatherdanyel : please check with the parents about the drum kit. It’s usually a gift you give to kids whose parents you dislike.
Post # 12
If she was younger I’d say don’t worry about it, but honestly 8 is old enough to totally be aware of things and pick up on it. What kinds of things is she into? Since she’s older what about a certificate to a “fun day” with you guys? Like maybe a trip to a trampoleen park or a gift basket with movie tickets and candy? Something that makes her feel important like she gets to go DO something.
8 is a hard age….because some girls are still into barbies (like it sounds like she is) while others have already grown out of that stage. At 8 my niece was more into clothes and things like that.
Post # 13
I would say, an array of Barbie clothes to go with the doll. They aren’t even that expensive, and you can get enough, it will look like a lot.
At 8, I would have been over the moon with that, and couldn’t care less about a drum kit or a car.
Post # 14
Either save one gift for another occasion (his birthday is only two months away – no reason why you can’t give one in December and one in February and have to give him both for Christmas).
Otherwise, 8 years old is old enough to have interests and hobbies. Sure, she’s only asking for a barbie, but hopefully you have some idea of her interests. Does she participate in any extracurriculars or sports? Like art, crafts, reading, playing games, writing stories, helping cook or bake? What’s her favorite subject at school? If she likes science there are all sorts of kits of fun things to experiment with. English you can buy her a journal or some books – if she likes a particular subject get her started on a series of books in that interest.
Post # 15
Save one of the nephew’s gifts for later on. Although I agree with some of the PP’s that many parents hate instrument toys cause they get loud and very annoying. I had cousins that had a drum set. My cousin’s was a gift and my aunt hated it but she’s throw a fit if they got rid of it too so they kept it for awhile and then bought her something else nice to make her forget about the drum set. They ditched it ASAP.