(Closed) Boundaries with friend's SO?

posted 7 years ago in Relationships
Post # 17
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1486 posts
Bumble bee

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@juliana192:  I totally feel you!  Uggghhh I’m sssooo glad my days of living with roommates is over.  In college, my brothers dated some super needy crazy girls and it was HELL having to deal with them whenever we came home.  Overall they were nice people, but some of their behaviors were really bizarre.  One girl used to use our expensive cologne as a friggin’ air freshner everytime she took a dump in our bathroom, and it wasn’t one or two squirts, she’d spray SO much that there would be a noticeable drop in the bottle. We asked her several times to NOT use it but she kept doing it, so we had to “ban” her from taking a #2 in our house from that moment on (crazy I know).  Another girl used to come into my bedroom and snoop around when I wasn’t home.  It got so bad that she started stealing my clothes, jewelry, make-up, etc. that she liked, but she always pleaded ‘not guilty’ and said she had no clue why my stuff was missing.  Until one day I came home early from work and caught her WEARING MY CLOTHES, she totally freaked out when she saw me and ran into my brother’s room and put on one of his big t-shirts to try to hide it.  When I confronted her, she said “oh I didn’t know these were your clothes…”  I tried really hard to keep the peace, but after that incident all hell broke loose.  Fun times >:P

I feel ya girl.  I don’t know why some of these needy girls are SO WEIRD with no social/personal boundaries.  That’s great your SO isn’t afraid of confrontation, but if things keep going on the way it is, you might have to really encourage him to be stronger in his confrontations to establish firmer boundaries.  From my experience, you can’t be too nice or cordial when you have the “boundary” talk with these girls and their BFs.  The nicer you try to be, the more they tend to keep overstepping that line and later when you try to be more firm with them, they go into “victim” mode and try to make you out to be the horrible mean person whose causing all the problems.  

Good-luck!

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