Sounds like he’s indeed ready…
Not only is he ready, he’s made that DECLARATION (Men don’t say stuff generally when it comes to emotions unless they mean it)
Sounds like he’s indeed ready… and means it
And men who are ready… tend to make plans and want to push ahead quickly !!
I take it you are a bit nervous, scared, anxious etc about all this happening now that it is real (many of us have that emotion, even if it was something we’ve wanted a long while)… it is because SUDDENLY it all seems TOO REAL
BUT you are totally ok with it happening, right? This is indeed what you want too, right?
If so, it is time to start having talks with him about YOUR Life Plan… he needs to know what it is you “envision” for the future… and to find out what he SEES happening
I say this, because you both need to be on the same page !!
Especially when it comes to the Wedding.
From your post, I take it YOU have never been married before… whereas he has.
Sometimes men (a lot of men) when they make up their minds want things to happen IMMEDIATELY. This catches a lot of girls off guard… and they end up having to “slow down” their guy.
This is because Men only see Marriage as a Destination… they are ready, they expect it to happen ASAP
Women see Marriage as what comes AFTER the Wedding. Men don’t understand the complexities of having a wedding. They figure you call up a Minister, go out and buy a dress on Friday, and get married on Saturday.
They have NO IDEA how much work and time is involved in planning a wedding (and nor do they have an idea of the cost)
When I was married the first time… My Ex and I got engaged just before Christmas, he wanted to be married around Valentines Day (impossible for a good sized “Family Wedding” with about 100 Guests)… we settled on Autumn. And still I felt somethings were rushed into preparation.
This time round…
Mr TTR and I were engaged in April on vacation at one of our favourite Beach Side Destinations. If it was up to him, we might have gotten married right there and then, just the two of us… but I wanted an Engagement Ring (that took 6 weeks to find once we got home), time to tell family & friends, and plan out a small intimate wedding (not a Courthouse one).
NOTE – Mr TTR and I are both “Encore” Brides & Grooms… and we both had a lot of issues to get thru about our past lives (Exes, Divorces, Kids, Pain & Hurt, Trust Issues etc). It took us 6+ years to get to this point in time, where it feels “safe” again enough for LOVE and MARRIAGE.
So now we are Eloping to a Destination Wedding in December, to be married on the Beach at this same spot where he proposed. It is about a 8 month span from start to finish, and even though we are having a small wedding (and later a Back Home Reception) things will still be tight timewise.
So why I am telling you all this? Well because you need to check in with your guy to see what he has visualized… because as an Encore Groom, it could be possible that his dream wedding is a quiet just you two affair. And the “vacation” he has planned includes a Wedding / Elopement as well (I’m not saying that is for sure what he is up to, but it wouldn’t surprise me in the least… happened to a Girlfriend of mine)
The good thing about having a LIFE PLAN chat with him at this point in time is you are both on the same page… wanting to get married. It is just a matter of HOW it all comes together. IF your dream is to have a Big White Wedding, and his isn’t then you can work thru that issue… and find a compromise (maybe a Destination Wedding with Family). OR if you are both set on having a Big White Wedding here, the “vacation” could become your honeymoon.
Getting on the same page is important so neither of you will be disappointed, and no time or money will be lost in this “unknown” time.
As you don’t have a ring yet, I suggest that you approach the subject in as much as a lighthearted way as possible…. once the ball gets rolling on “the conversation” things should be ok, it is initiating it that is difficult.
Hope this helps,
PS… Happy to hear your good news… can’t wait to celebrate with you. Do come back and show off the ring when it happens.