(Closed) Boyfriend or Fiance?

posted 12 years ago in Waiting
Post # 32
Member
107 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: October 2020 - Auberge du Soleil

Call him whatever you like πŸ™‚ I didn’t really like the term finace (I felt like I was trying to get people to ask me about our wedding…) so I usually just called him by his first name and everyone either new his name or figured it out πŸ™‚

Post # 33
Member
2 posts
Wannabee

 

We too avoided using fiance, it just has a presumptuous sound to me. The only time we really used the term was when dealing with wedding planning/vendors.  We had been together for awhile, and I think we had been emotionally married for awhile.  The whole engagement phase just felt like a necessary step to get into the next phase, but nothing really extrordinarly special.  Thats just us πŸ™‚

Post # 34
Member
416 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2008 - Imperia Hotel (modern chic hotel)

Actually…. im married now and can’t seem to say husband… so ya I still say boyfriend. (even when i was engaged – boyfriend was the word — fiance was weird to my ears)

Post # 35
Member
86 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

I think everyone should do what feels most comfortable to them.  My fiancé and I have been engaged for a couple of months now, and it’s still taking time to remember to use the word fiancé and not boyfriend.  I don’t have an issue with the word, however… I was a French minor in undergrad, so it seems more normal to me than it might to others (and that lovely minor is also why I incessantly use the accented é … it’s out of habit more than being particular about it). Husband/boyfriend/fiancé/signficant other/partner/etc… it doesn’t really matter in the end… what matters is the relationship…

 To borrow a line from Shakespeare:
"What’s in a name? that which we call a rose
 By any other name would smell as sweet"

Post # 36
Member
152 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: March 2010

I think for me its so surreal that often i still refer to him as my "boyfriend" and we’ve been engaged since april… luckily we have a 23 month engagement, so i’ll be able to get used to "fiance" before i have to get used to "hubby"… LOL. I think its kinda normal… but that’s just me! πŸ™‚

Post # 37
Member
51 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: September 2009

I think it’s weird calling my love "my fiancé" too and I’m glad that I’m not the only one.  To me it almost seems as if I am boasting that we’re getting married and I am not one who likes to call attention to herself.  However, since we’ve lived together for 3+ years, sometimes when business needs to get done i.e. complaining about our cable which is in his name, I explain that I am his wife, just so I don’t run into any problems with them questioning my authority.

Post # 38
Member
56 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: August 2009

I also have terrible neuroses about using the word "fiance" and prefer "boyfriend." Actually, I just prefer to use his name, but that generally doesn’t work with casual acquaintances who’ve never met him, like co-workers.

I’ll admit that the reason I dislike saying "fiance" is because it reminds me of that old Seinfeld episode where, at a cocktail party at someone’s apartment, Elaine gets stuck in a conversation with an insufferable woman who says, "Have you seen my fiance? I have lost my fiance!" And the kicker is that she pronounces "fiance" like "fee-on-SAY," with the emphasis on the last syllable. It’s like nails on a chalkboard, and I hear the entire scene in my head every time I say "fiance."

Post # 39
Member
3124 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: December 2009

i felt the same way!! and now, in 11 weeks, i’m going to have to say husband.  I’m freaking out, man

Post # 40
Member
1 posts
Wannabee
  • Wedding: October 2010

Me and my now fiance have been going out for 4 months and I am so sure shes the one for me. Ive been having trouble lately with the transfer from the word girlfriend to fiance. Whenever i say girlfriend to her or someone else she gets really mad because she thinks that i dont think of her as my fiance. I am just so used to calling her that (girlfriend), that its stuck in my head. Sometimes, and im hoping to be all the time, i call her my fiance and shes happy. What can i do to remember to say fiance? i love her so much she is the most amazing girl in the world. i only want to see her happy and her beautiful smile that lights up my life.

ilovedaniellesomuch

 

Post # 41
Member
1251 posts
Bumble bee

I hate the word Fiance. I always just call him my boy. Fiance just sounds so…beyotchy.

Post # 42
Member
7152 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2010

COngrats!! We have been engaged since Oct and I still say bofriend sometimes…..it’s ok either way πŸ™‚

Post # 43
Member
4122 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

Right after we got engaged we had to go to his fathers companies work party… He saw an old friend and when he introduced me as his fiance I’m pretty sure my face lit up and my heart skipped a beat. I was so worried he’d just call me his Girlfriend… I LOVE hearing him call me his fiance…  πŸ™‚

I agree, it’s a change, but one we both love.

Post # 44
Member
1525 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

I dnt really like the word Fiance (I watched the movie Lone Star State of Mind, and it kind of killed it for me lol great movie tho) so I either just say my boyfriend or his name with nothing in front. He calls me Fiance or his wife tho and just says its close enough lol

Post # 45
Member
47 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: August 2010

I still call him my boyfriend 99 percent of the time, as “fiance” seems too “Ask-Me-About-Our-Wedding” to me.  He prefers it as well, although it drives his mother crazy.  His brother, on the other hand, has been calling me his sister-in-law for about six years.

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