Boyfriend suggested marriage at the courthouse and THEN proposing to me later…

posted 3 months ago in Engagement
Post # 17
Member
2842 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: December 2017 - Courthouse

I agree with the PP that said you can just get engaged sooner, do a courthouse wedding and then celebrate with family and friends after. That’s what we did. The first weekend after the wedding we celebrated locally with my DH’s family and then the next weekend we went to my hometown where all my family and friends were. It’s not traditional but it works and it’s simple. I would do that. 

I don’t see any reason why he can’t propose before the courthouse wedding. I’m not big on the celebratory stuff as it sounds like you aren’t OP, but it is nice to spend at least a little time as an engaged couple before getting married! 

Post # 18
Member
1773 posts
Buzzing bee

I’m wondering if he has his heart set on a proposal that has to take place during a certain timeframe or climate.  

You asked a lot of questions of him…but you don’t seem to have gotten any answers to them. 

Post # 19
Member
6814 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2016

I would say this “It makes me feel SO good that you are excited and want to marry me right away.  It makes me feel loved and adored and yes, I’m all in. I would really like it if you proposed to me as soon as my ring comes back and then we plan a courthouse wedding for the spring (or sooner if that is your preference). I already think of us as engaged but I know it’s important for you to ask. Then we can go on and plan the big family celebration for later. How does that sound for you?”

Post # 20
Member
1440 posts
Bumble bee

View original reply
strawberrysakura :  I had the same thought. But still it’s weird to do it afterwards just so he can get his perfect proposal moment. 

Post # 21
Member
355 posts
Helper bee

View original reply
schmeebee85 :  Oh for crying out loud. No, you cannot marry someone and then propose later. What’s going to happen is you’ll get married and then he’ll realize that proposing marriage to someone he is already married to is ridiculous and then he’ll get all mopey that he should have just proposed beforehand. He needs to decide between proposing now and getting married sooner or proposing in spring and then getting married later.

Post # 22
Member
571 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2019

If you go ahead and get married now, you get to count the entire year as married for tax purposes. 😉

Post # 23
Member
257 posts
Helper bee

Honestly…my first thoughts after reading your post are that he’s hiding something or is going to surprise you with your family and friends at the courthouse.  I’ve probably seen too many movies. Lol.  Maybe he’s just caught in the moment and not thinking things through because it makes zero sense.

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