Post # 481
chitownyogini : People post on forums for numerous reasons, which include seeking advice or reading other people’s thoughts. Maybe she didn’t find any reason convincing enough to change her mind, and maybe nothing will. People also post to be able to express their views freely and to just talk to others, because talking to family and friends does not always lead to open and unbiased discussions on very sensitive topics. Whatever her reason is, I suppose she’ll continue posting as long as she’s getting something out of it, and she should be the one deciding if this thread is useful, not other bees.
Post # 482
beetobe27 : Definitely not trying to decide anything. Just stating my opinion.
Post # 483
lochness : Ok, if he’s busy on Saturday, then why don’t you wait till Sunday, explain that you are leaving, and then go? Yes, it’s going to be tough mentally but you’ve got to do it soon if not now.
Post # 484
lochness : End of the month would be more realistic, sure, but he seems to be failing to understand your split is permanent while you live with him and keeps trying to get you to to agree to getting engaged. Another 10 days of that sounds overbearing.
Post # 485
I disagree with previous posters on this.
If he’s upset and angry that you are leaving at the end of the month, don’t worsen the situation by leaving the house you share this weekend. What if he creates problems for you when you try to get your things from the house you share? You will make your life difficult unnecessarily.
Post # 486
beepboopbop : What?? That’s a horrible thing to make that assumption just because she doesn’t want a prenup must automatically means she wants his money. How shortsighted of you not to mention just plain old rude. I just flagged your ignorant comment.
Post # 487
I think you should get him to tell the guests at the party that it’s not happening. That should get the point across that it’s over. And you need to inform your guests anyway.
Post # 488
Did you move to your property temporarily? Hope you’re alright.
Post # 489
Well, Bee. It would appear that the Swarm has moved on to micromanaging your moving out process.
It would probably be best if you could just post your entire itenerary. Please be sure to include the name and contact info for the moving company as well as the time and date of your anticipated departure.
Any unexpected delays should be fully explained and documented, of course. Extensions will be granted on a case by case basis upon a showing of sufficient urgency.
Post # 490
Bees, please keep the catty comments to yourselves please. This post is getting a lot of flags for various comments.
Post # 491
sassy411 : Lol. Can’t speak for others but I posted because a break up is tough and it must be hard to have to move even if temporarily, so I hope she’s coping fine.
Post # 492
sassy411 : Maybe I should! I didn’t move permanently this weekend, and I don’t think I should have to do it to make it clear to him that we are not in a relationship anymore. I think saying it should be enough for him to understand, and that he’s not getting the message and won’t accept it means I was right to go away for the weekend to have some space.
saturnian : I did and I’m not ok but it is what it is. I didn’t move permanently because it’s not possible for me to just move out one fine day without any planning.
Post # 493
One thing about breaking up with people once you start doubting their character—they will validate the heck out of your decision for you.
Post # 494
lochness : He might be in denial that the relationship has ended. Maybe he needs a few days.
Post # 495
lochness : when my exH and I decided to separate, he didn’t officially move out for almost a month, because you are right, it’s not that easy to do.
and while I was counting the days until he was out for good (because it was increasingly awkward and hard to be around each other) I wanted him to take the time to find a place to live and not just move out because he felt forced. Even though we were divorcing, I was still going to treat him with decency.
OP, I applaud you for standing up for yourself and following your gut. Right now might feel like a struggle, but this too shall pass.