(Closed) Boyfriend's taste in my clothing has changed

posted 5 years ago in Relationships
Post # 3
Member
3762 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

It’s definitely not his place to control what you wear. Unless you are wearing wildly inappropriate things (think nicki minaj) just wear what you like. It sounds like he is jealous of the attention you get, which makes it his insecurity problem, not yours. Are you also in your 20’s? I’m all for dressing your age, but I don’t think you should feel like you have to wear things that are “older” for you and that don’t flatter your body.

 

Post # 4
Member
1685 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

I think it’s getting older.

In college I used to dress to impress: cleavage, show off some leg, and kept it tight.

Now that I’m a professional, I am far more “mature” with my clothing decisions.  I don’t sport cleavage or wear anything skin tight anymore.  I tend to go for things that are cut right for my body and don’t flash skin.  

My fiance would probably prefer me to show a little more cleavage, but my job has completely taken over my wardrobe.

Post # 5
Member
11234 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2013

@hollyberry4:  Wow, way off.

OP, it sounds like he’s getting older and his tastes are changing. Your taste in clothing changed, didn’t it? 

Post # 6
Member
4275 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: April 2012

I think you should ask him.

Post # 7
Member
6256 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: March 2014

Do you pick out his clothes?

Post # 8
Member
309 posts
Helper bee

I think as men get older and more mature, they start looking for wife material 

 

when he was younger he was probably fine with you dressing scantily because he just enjoyed having a hot girlfriend an showing you off

 

now that he’s starting to think more seriously about a future, he probably thinks differently about his wife’s goodies being out vs a girlfriend.

 

most men don’t like to think about the future mother of their children chasing a two year old in a mini skirt, tube too, and stilettos.

 

not saying there aren’t ANY men out there like that or that its wrong, just guessing where your particular SO’s head is at

Post # 9
Member
3886 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

many people  are initially attracted to the sexier side of their mate, but as love grows, what is sexy or attractive in their eye softens a bit, and it’s less about the 4-inch stilettos and more about you as a person. It’s something of a de-objectifying process, and normal. I’d say that his tastes are changing, likely just due to getting a bit older, but also because he loves the “natural” or “comfortable” you even more.

Post # 11
Member
558 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

I know where you’re coming from and I’ve been there too. My SO used to love it when I would dress up and look sexy – he liked showing me off. But a year and a half later, he has kindly suggested that I wear more “professional” outfits. He used to go nuts over skirts and heels, and now he prefers jeans and a cardigan. 

I think a lot of it has to do with growing up and maturing. (This is hard to phrase right without sounding like I’m objectifying myself or implying that he contols what I do/wear. That’s not the case at all and I wasn’t offended when he said he liked more mature styles on me.) I just think he had his fun with the “look how hot my girlfriend is” phase and now he’s moving on and getting more serious. Guys want what other guys want and they like other males approval that they picked a good one. Now he’s had enough approval and doesn’t need/want other guys checking out his lady. I wouldn’t take offense to it.

Post # 12
Member
6256 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: March 2014

@anon00:  If Fiance tried to tell me what he wanted me to wear, I’d mock him and wear what I wanted anyway. I guess whatever works for you guys, as long as it’s mutual.

Post # 13
Member
3762 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

@vorpalette:  Sorry if i’m “way off”. I used to be in a relationship where my ex was super controlling about what I wore. It drove me nuts and really messed with my self-esteem.

I saw some similarities in OP’s post, and it got me a little on the defensive. I don’t think there’s anything with having your tastes in your SO’s wardrobe “mature”, I just don’t think it should be dictated. If I am way off base and that is not at all what is happening, then that’s fine.

I always think a woman should be able to wear what she likes and feels sexy in, as long as it’s not overly inappropriate.

Post # 14
Member
11234 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2013

@hollyberry4:  I was in that relationship, too, but her post doesn’t come off at all that way. He isn’t telling her that she can or can’t wear something, he’s telling her what he likes.

Post # 16
Member
2143 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2015

I think it’s normal for your taste in clothes to change over time, hopefully he’s ok with you wearing what you’d prefer to though.

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