Post # 1
Member
575 posts
Busy bee
I wanted to write this post to help share frustrations for anyone in my place. I am slowly getting okay with how things are but it is still hard. I grew up with stories about my mom leaking everywhere because of her abundant supply of milk, I always assumed I would have the same problem, yeah I wish!
After my little girl was born I was breast feeding, but noticed she was only hungry about every 4 hours, and would typically fall asleep. The peditirican told us she was losing too muh weight and her jandice numbers were getting to a dangerously high level. They asked me to start pumping and feeding her via sryinge. Pumping was not a problem for me, but I don’t get a lot. I will pump every two to three hours for 15 minutes at a time with Medela, typically getting a total of 40 ml per sitting. I am now two weeks post partum, so we have been forced to supplement with formula
We have been meeting with a lactation consultant. We have tried a nipple shield, and inserting a feeding tube in her mouth while she is at the breast. Then the LC determined she had forgotten how to suck, so we went to bottles to try and fix that. I am meeting with the LC for the forth time today to see if we can transition back to the breast.
I wanted to share my experience thus far because I felt very guilty about all of this for a while, stressing me out more than needed. I felt like a failure, and a bad mom. I am starting to accept I’m doing everything I can but it still gets hard everytime I have to mix formula. I hope in reading this I might help other struggling moms know they are not alone.
Post # 3
Member
2891 posts
Sugar bee
Aww it isnt your fault! I am sorry you are going thru this. One of my besties went thru this too and we did find a solution that works for her. Take alfalfa tablets available thru puritans pride. Totally safe they are just greens but dairy farmers feed their cows alfalfa for a reason. Then start eating lots of pumpkin. It really boosted her milk supply and it is the right time of year to buy it! As weird as it may sound a lot of the Amish around here swear by it and since it has no negative side effects……
Post # 4
Member
868 posts
Busy bee
@carriejuly: As the daughter of a lactation consultant, I can say with 100% confidence that you are doing great! My mom always tells her clients that even one day of breast milk is a great gift that you gave to your child. I can’t imagine the emotions that go along with really wanting to BF and struggling. I’m haven’t had a baby yet (due in March) so I don’t have much in the way of advice, but I do wish you the best of luck in your BFing journey. Thanks for sharing your story- I think that if women felt comfortable to be more open about their struggles, we would have less feelings of “guilt” or “shame”. We can’t control the way our bodies produce/react. Keep us up to date on how things go!
Post # 5
Member
2891 posts
Sugar bee
Whatever you do, do not feel guilty. You are a great mom look at the lengths you aregoing to for your child. 😀 Hang in there momma!
Post # 6
Member
7779 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
I really, really wanted to breastfeed. Due to medical complications, my milk, literally, never came in. I tried and tried, she dropped tons of weight and started to get juandice. I saw several LCs. I even quit for a few weeks and then tried to relactate. I tried an SNS… everything. I went to extremes most women don’t.
Let me give you a piece of advice, from one woman who had a long struggle with breastfeeding to another…. it’s okay. It is. It’s been 6 months since I stopped BFing and I still have the pangs of bitterness and anger over the situation, but I have had my greiving period and I have come to terms with what happened. Formula was what was best for my daughter and I. She is gorgeous and healthy and happy and, in the end, that’s what matters, not what she’s eating.
There is a certain point where breastfeeding is NOT what is best for mother and child. There is a point where the struggle is doing more harm than good. There is a point where the mother is holding on more for herself than her child. When you reach that point… it’s time to say that you did your best and move on. My LC told me something when I finally made the decision to switch totally to formula that I will never forget. She said that when breastfeeding is causing so much stress that you dread your child being hungry and having to feed her/him, then stop breastfeeding because it’s not worth it.
You are doing your best. You are trying everything you can to make this work. You should absolutely, 100% NOT feel guilty if it doesn’t work out. I know that you won’t feel that way now and there is nothing I can say that will stop those feelings, but it’s true. You are not a failure. You are a good mom. You are.
Feel free to PM me any time. I’ve been there. I know what you’re going through.
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