(Closed) Bridal Assistant?

posted 6 years ago in Logistics
Post # 17
13905 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

From a brief google search:

– Fetch food/drink for the bride<br />- Decorate the venue (if necessary)<br />- Run intereference with disruptive guests<br />- Liaison between vendors (photographer, DJ, etc)<br />- Call cabs for drunk guests who can’t drive<br />- Assist in cleaning the venue

Like I said, I don’t view any of those as an honor.  I would feel like a servant.

Post # 18
9128 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper

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amelliafay:  If you have to turn to an internet board to find things for her to do then do you really need a personal assistant? Wouldn’t it be much better to just say thanks for the offer but I would really like you to just enjoy the day as a guest? Just because something is offered does not mean we have to take it.

Post # 19
4 posts
  • Wedding: January 2014

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JiminyCricket:   This might just be a midwest thing, but it’s VERY normal and actually an honor to be a “Personal Attendant”.  Most weddings that I’ve been to have at least 1 (if not 2 or 3).  The Personal Attendants are part of the entire day, honored in the program, given corsages, and in many cases wear special dresses/do their makeup/etc.

I’ve talked with some people who were not familiar with this role who thought it sounded “demeaning” or like you’re making them a servant – however, it’s quite an honor where I’m from.

Post # 20
4 posts
  • Wedding: January 2014

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amelliafay:  Hey 🙂

I’m not sure where you’re at with your planning but I would absolutely suggest that you consider accepting your friend’s offer to be your Personal Attendant (that’s what we call them where I’m from).  

I’ve been in many wedding parties (people called me “27 dresses” until I got married earlier this year) and  from that experience I can tell you that having a Personal Attendant is invaluable.

Because every wedding day is so different, you really won’t know what her role is until that day.  I chose to have 3 Personal Attendants (2-3 is pretty typical from the weddings I’ve been a part of).  

I asked certains to do certain things (give corsages to the appropriate people, fluff my dress before walking down the aisle, etc.) but part of their role was simply being available.  

For me, the 3 girls were extensions of my bridal party (if I’d had had more bridesmaids, they would have been these girls) — so I was honoring them as well.  These girls were honored in the program, sat up front at a special table, wore a similar dress to bridesmaids, and attended all wedding fun.  Yes, it was an honor for them but they also enjoyed it! 

One of the great things about Personal Attendants is that you know you have someone (close to you who hopefully enjoys caring for and helping other people) who is tending to you that day. Unexpected things pop up and it’s a great peace of mind to know that I can say, “Hey, Micaela, can you see where my mom is?”  <br />“Hey, Sara, what time is it?  Are we supposed to head down the aisle soon?”  <br />”Hey, Linsday, Can you hold my flowers while we take a picture without them?” 


Here’s the catch:  Not all people enjoy helping other people.  Not all people will think serving you on your special day is an honor.  HOWEVER it sounds like you’ve found someone who would thoroughly enjoy doing this.. and because she enjoys it, she’ll probably be great at and… she’ll more thoroughly enjoy your wedding day.

I’ve found that my favorite weddings are the ones that I was able to be behind-the-scenes helping (as a Personal Attendant, Wedding Coordinator, or simply a guest who realized the wedding wasn’t organized and things were falling through the cracks – thus, I stepped up).  To be able to invest in someone’s once-in-a-lifetime day is incredible.

The following are actual things I’ve done/seen done by Personal Attendants:

  • Helping the bride with hair/makeup
  • Reminding the bride/bridesmaids of schedule (keeping them on time)
  • Greeting the photographer when they arrive for hair/makeup/dress
  • Helping bride put on her dress 
  • Helping bride make sure she has all her items (jewelry, veil, etc)
  • Putting corsages/flowers on appropriate people
  • Helping during photos by getting people ready for the pics
  • Being the go-between the wedding coordinator/bridal party in letting them know of the time to walk down the aisle
  • Final touches for bride before walking down aisle (fluffing dress before final departure)
  • After the wedding: removing veil, bustling wedding dress, lighting candles, making sure bride/groom eat
  • Decorating hotel room
  • Driving bride/groom to hotel

This might sound like “Oh my gosh, you’re making them do so much!”  Here’s the news:  If someone is wire to LOVE to serve, they will LOVE this.  Like I said, my fav weddings were ones that I was able to bless the couple!

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