(Closed) Bridal Party advice

posted 9 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 3
11533 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: May 2009

The bridal party does not need to be “even” if you really would like to have all seven girls.  I don’t think seven is too many bridesmaids, so, if you really want to include your college friends, I think you should do that. 

However, if having an even number of attendants on both sides is important to you, perhaps there are three other guys (family members on your side or his, or guy friends of yours or his) who are close to you and whom your Fiance could ask to also be groomsmen.

Post # 4
2050 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

@Rachael_9:  I’m going to try to help you narrow down your bridal party choices just because I’ve been noticing that most of the time, once you get above 3 or 4, it starts to become about pleasing other people rather than pleasing the bride and groom.

For a moment, don’t worry about the evenness of the bridal party, or the fact that you met all these people at the same time in HS or college or whatever. Look at them individually. Ask yourself how reliable each of these people are and if you have the slightest hesitation about any of them turning the day into a circus or instead, truly honoring you, supporting you, and being there for you. Have each of these ladies shown up to past events when they said they would? Have they each respected your decision-making on something that you were managing or working out, or have they bullied in with their own choices in the past of what they think you should do? Do they each fully support your marriage and understand that the honor of being asked to be in a bridal party isn’t about them, but about something bigger than them? Will they be upset that you didn’t choose them, or will they respect your wishes and just be happy to be there to celebrate your happiness (<– p.s. this is the person you want as a bridesmaid!) We can love a lot of people in our lives, but that doesn’t necessarily mean that they are people we want with us when we’re trying to be calm and get in our bridal gown, or standing up with us on our wedding day.

Post # 5
3501 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: March 2002

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@Cornflakegirl:  + 1

and another thing that really helped me, is not thinking about people who ive been close with in the past or present. it was really thinking about those who Fiance and i will still talk with in 10 years. the people that work hard to stick together thru long distance, life changes and the ones you can pick it back up with and its like you never skipped a beat. surely focus on those that will support you and stick with you thru it all! having uneven sides bothers me because i have a major ocd issue, but maybe your ushers could be groomsmen as well?! or you can keep it even at 3. also, (i have 3) and buying gifts for a large amount gets spendy! at the end of the day just think of you want to see in your pictures 10 years down the road and who will be there 🙂

Post # 6
619 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: March 2013

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@Cornflakegirl:  Well said!!! I WISH I read this BEFORE I made my decisions. I just posted about this topic and my bridal party remorse!

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