Post # 1
Hi…hoping for some constructive advice from all the lovely brides to be so here goes. I’m getting married in Oct and a few months ago, we asked our wedding party of 3 bm’s and 5 gm’s to help us celebrate our special day. At the time we had a guest list of 140, but due to stress over the financial aspect of it, we cut the guest list to 70 and mutually agreed to trim the wedding party to Maid/Matron of Honor and Best Man only. Yesterday my fiancée says he doesn’t know why we cut the wedding party because what’s a few more $$’s towards gifts/bouquets etc. Now mind you I’ve already told my two BM’s the situation and they understood why I had to downsize. My fiancée now wants me to re-ask them. I’m shocked and a bit embarrassed to do this. I don’t know how to handle this. The etiquette on this is boggling my mind. Please help with suggestions..thank you 🙂
Post # 2
I think you need to sit him down and get to the bottom of the situation. Is he having a hard time narrowing down his guys? Maybe he can have two “best men.” (girls do it all the time) Does he just not want to tell 4 of the guys that you are slimming down the wedding party? You can talk to him about how you talked to your girls.
As long as you aren’t cutting them off the guest list, you can also explain to him that his friends won’t have to rent or buy special clothes, and can save their money. And they can still do everything a wedding party would do (hang out all day, have a kicking bachlor party ect) without having the title.
Post # 3
Has he already “downsized” to just the Best Man? If so, I think you should just keep things the way they are with “just” the maid of honor and the best man, and not re-ask people. That just seems awfully wishy-washy to me.
Post # 4
He asked them all already and def didn’t have a hard time choosing. The thing is once we decided to downsize the wedding party, I went ahead and told my girls and thought that he would have told the guys too but he is so layed back, too layed back on certain things that this is where we’re at. Time was ticking away fast and I don’t like to wait on things…once it’s done it’s time to cross it off the list..next on the agenda please. I never thought he would change his mind like this. The original wedding party are still on our guest list for sure. I’m a worry wart about things and for him to dump this on me now is unfair. It’s his wedding too and he should have who he wants as I. Maybe I’m making too much of this 🙁