Post # 1
I’m feeling a bit down about my Bridal Party. On the guys side, they still haven’t organised to get their suits booked – I had to book the times for their waistcoats measurements (these we’re having made – the suits are being hired).
Now, my bridesmaids. I have 3 bridesmaids and 1 Maid of honour. Two have offered to help. One is helping. The other one keeps saying she will help but then never does. (Yet she’s the one that lives closest to me etc). Now the other two have done NOTHING. 🙁 I asked them to send me their measurements because my seamstress is ready to start their dresses and their attitude was pretty much “ja ok when I can”.
I feel I chose my BMs not only because I love them and they’re my good friends. But because they’re people I believed I could turn to for help with the wedding, preperations etc. One of the bms hardly talks to me at all – unless I start a convo with her. Do I ask her to step down? And if so, how the heck do I do that without breaking a friendship. I don’t know what to do.
Post # 3
So sorry for what you are going through! Believe it or not I think you have the lesser of two evils – too much unwanted help and input is totally taxing. My one Bridesmaid or Best Man is a lovely lovely girl but she has always been super bossy and is doing it even now. It drains me! LOL.
I think you should send a mail to everyone saying that you need people’s input here and there and maybe have lunch together and get them psyched for the wedding?
Post # 4
Hey there! I kind of agree with Flanders… Maybe your girls aren’t being pushy because they don’t know how stressed you are/trying to butt out! I know that in my own case my girls will be the same way, but I hope to plan everything to a T with my fiance, and then the bridal party can help us put things into action IF we are stressing. Too much input from both sets of parents has been too much already, and I’m kind of glad my girls are like this.
I think the best thing to do is try to hint your stress. Maybe they need it spelled out. If they have never been married themselves or have never been involved in a wedding then they clearly have NOOOOO idea how stresssful it really can be. Some people just aren’t psychic 😛 Maybe you can give them set deadlines for when you want certain things done, or you can book days for you guys to get together and do things (i.e. make the invitations together while watching girly movies).
P.S- if they get upset with you for these tiny little favours/pushing them to get these important things done…then maybe they aren’t true friends. A good friend will understand 🙂
Post # 5
@Flanders: Thank you – I guess that makes sense!! Rather too little help and do it myself the way I want it, than too much help and feel like I’ve had no input in my own wedding….
Post # 6
@indecisivebride89: Three have been married and the fourth very involved in her sisters wedding…. I guess that’s why I was expecting a bit more help and understanding. But like Flanders says… I have the lesser of two evils!
I had one Bridesmaid or Best Man over for a glass of wine tonight and we discussed certain things, and then next weekend we are getting together for their dress fittings and another friend of mine is doing their make up for the wedding…so will use that day to do their trial make up, eat pizza and chill Taken a deep breath, stepped back and decided to stick to my promise that I made to myself…to NOT be a stressed out bride!! x