I’m pretty sure I set myself up for this epic failure.
BFF since college. Love her to death. Possessive little thing she is. All 4’10” of her vs my 5’10” – match made in heaven, I know. Anyway…
After almost a decade of friendship and loyalty, I just knew she would be my Maid of Honor and therefore named her so.
AND THEN…The fight
No communication between us for a few months. Seems like a lifetime for such a pair. Then a new one comes along. Love her to death. We hang, we bond, we cause multiple acts of debauchery – we live out the rest of our mid-twenties. She moves in on the Maid of Honor position, without the invite? kthx.
Here comes the spunky 4’10”. She finds out – it’s like we’re married and I’ve cheated on her and she’s about to do some crazy fatal attraction shit. They’re civil to each other, they even hang out – but both know there can only be one. Kicker? THEY USE THIS AGAINST ME IN FIGHTS.
I don’t really think that’s fair, but whatever…
I’m wondering if any of you have had the same scenario (maybe not exact but…) and what advice you could give to handle such a situation.
Some people say to just have two. Some say just have a Matron of Honor and keep it moving.
Let them fight to the death like this scene from Star Trek?:
Seriously, I’d sit down with both of them individually and request that they act more respectfully regarding their support of YOU and YOUR wedding day. This is an HONOR, not a frickin’ popularity contest. See if you and Miss Thang #1 can resolve your differences. If so, and she can promise to adhere to all the things you see fit for a Maid/Matron of Honor, she shall remain Maid/Matron of Honor, in which case, Miss Thang #2 will need to be schooled in the art of eating some humble pie for her assumption of being the Maid/Matron of Honor replacement. If Miss Thang #1 continues to give you grief, let her go, and go through the formality of asking Miss Thang #2, that is, only if she can adhere to the Maid/Matron of Honor duties you request. If either of them can’t play nice, you take your bouncy ball and go elsewhere. They don’t have to be in the bridal party or invited to the wedding at all if it brings them that much grief, and you certainly don’t need any more grief either. Good luck!
I completely agree with cornflakegirl. Both these girls need to respect the fact that it’s your wedding day! You have the right to chose who seems fit and who YOU want to be your MOH–both of them need to stop causing a cat fight and then using it against you. If they can’t play nice and act like respectful friends, then out the door they BOTH go!
Let us know how it works out! Good luck with everything!