Post # 1
I’m a bridesmaid for the first time and I’m wondering what responsibilities I have?
There are two other girls and no one has said anything about bridal showers or stagettes etc. and the wedding is in August.
I’ve been waiting for the Maid/Matron of Honor to lead the way but she hasn’t made a move and I’m worried that it’s going to diminish the bridal experience for the bride if nothing is organized but I also don’t want to step on any toes…advice?
As bridesmaids what types of events and activities have you organized and engaged in?
What types of gifts did you bring?
Any advice is very much appreciated! 🙂
Post # 3
I would email the Maid/Matron of Honor and copy it to the other BM’s. Ask if she has made any plans yet for the bachelorette and shower, or does she want you all to brainstorm together?
Post # 4
If the Maid/Matron of Honor drops the ball, It would be best to try to make things happen. Not to step on MOH’s toes but it would be sad if the bride missed out on all the little things that go along with getting married.
Post # 5
Maybe you could talk to the Maid/Matron of Honor and let her know that you are more than happy to help her plan things. I know I would have been THRILLED is any of the bridesmaids in my best friends wedding had offered to help plan anything! If you cannot seem to get in touch, I would talk to the bride and let her know that you need to talk to her Maid/Matron of Honor and get HER to make it happen. Brides need to understand that when your bridesmaids and Maid/Matron of Honor arent all best friends, communication can be very difficult.
That being said, I have been a Maid/Matron of Honor twice now. Each time I was a full time student in college and working. I was SUPER busy and I had to fit wedding planning in there and it was crazy. Sometimes you think you have all of this time before you have to start planning the shower and bachlorette party and then BAM, you realize that you waited too long and you are running around like a crazy person getting everything together. I was making food, favors, games and I decorate cakes to I made a two tier cake for the bridal shower. That being said I did not have the time to decorate for the shower at the Mother of the Bride’s house. The other Bridesmaids would not contribute any money towards the shower and could not be bothered with helping to plan either. The bride’s Mother stepped up and helped decroate for me.
I would say if the Maid/Matron of Honor and bridesmaids could open up some sort of communication and start discussing dates and a theme for the shower that would be a great starting point. Find out how much everyone is able to contribute to the shower, either by helping pay for it or helping decorate and what not. Maybe everyone could get together one day over the weekend and go to the local party store and pick up the decorations that are needed. While shopping you are able to bring up things like games, favors, food, etc. Also, it is never to early to start brainstorming about the Bachlorette party. If you want to go out of town you will need to have time to book a hotel room after all. Personally, A girls night in at a hotel was awesome. The bride wanted to go out dancing and that part turned into a nightmare. Girls were drunk and the bride was not happy when we ended up babysitting. She told me that if she could do it all over again that she would have stayed in the hotel room ALL night.
If the wedding is in August then I would say that the shower needs to happen rather soon, depending on when in August. For both times I was a Maid/Matron of Honor, I had the shower four to six weeks before the wedding and the Bachlorette party two weeks before the wedding.
I did give a gift for the shower and the wedding, as should all of the bridesmaids. I made a little gift basket of goodies for the Bachlorette party and gave the bride a small gift from Victoria’s Secret on her wedding day while we were getting ready.
Post # 6
Wow! Great response, thank you! That really helped a lot. I’m not close with the Maid/Matron of Honor or the other bridesmaids but I’ll defnintely them know I’m open to helping in anyway possible!