(Closed) Bridal Party Problem

posted 6 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 3
10644 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: January 2011

You shouldn’t have had someone else step in without at least talking to your friend first.  You have a Maid of Honour, your old friend is married and she can be your Matron of Honour.

Post # 5
5954 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: April 2018

Oops…looks like you’ve got some explaining to do,  if it were me, I’d show up with a bottle of wine and a box of red velvet cupcakes and eat through this uncomfortable conversation!

Post # 6
2781 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

@AB Bride:  Agreed!


@shatari19:  You can’t rescind her invite to be maid of honour, sorry, thats rude and no friendship would survive that. Also, you never should have filled the position without   letting her know in the first place.

Post # 7
3572 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

Did you ever try to contact her during those six months?  I think you have to include her as Maid/Matron of Honor, and maybe even ask the other girl to be a regular Bridesmaid or Best Man

Post # 9
943 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

How about having two MOHs? Many people do that.

Post # 11
658 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: December 2012

Ouch. I guess I would have spoke to her first before replacing her, but if she was unreachable, then I don’t know what you could have done.

Perhaps talking to her and telling her you understand that she is going through a lot right now and don’t want to add to her stress by requesting for her to carry out the maid of honor duties. So, you could have her still stand in your wedding, if she still wants to and have your new made of honor.

Post # 12
141 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

Get together with her IN PERSON and explain what you’ve said here: you’d tried many times to reach her and couldn’t, and out of consideration for the challenges she’s going through, you didn’t want to add to her stress and difficulties and have asked someone else to step into the role.

Coulda, woulda, shoulda but you really should have communicated with her, even if it was an unanswered email or voicemail that you were concerned about her being MIA, you hoped she was ok, but that if you didn’t hear from her by X date you were going to have to make some adjustments to the wedding party and then called her after X date to apologize and let her know that you had no choice but to replace ehr as Maid/Matron of Honor, you hoped she’d understand, and that you really hoped you two could get together soon to visit and offer your support to her whenever she needs it.

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