- 8 years ago
- Wedding: September 2011
I need some emotional support! I apologize in advance for how lengthy this post is.
My Fiance and I have asked all of our bridal party members.
My FH has a twin sister (we’ll call her Amber) and an older sister (we will call her Lindsey). I, on the other hand, have 4 older sisters and two older brothers. Therefore, it is not reasonable for us to include everyone and still have the wedding we want (we don’t want a HUGE bridal party). So, after some debating we decided to have 5 people on each side, which is the following:My side: Two of my close friends, two of my sisters, Amber His side: 5 friendsOther people included: Lindsey (reader), her husband and my two brothers (ushers)
Alright, now that you have the background info, here’s what has happened–
When we were calling our families to tell them we were engaged I called my sister. Her first words were “I’m in the wedding, right?” I actually thought that was kind of funny because it is totally her personality, I was in her wedding, and she was going to be in mine anyway.
About a month later–
FH asked 4 of his groomsmen. All were kind and excited.
When Lindsey found out she wasn’t a bridesmaid she basically threw a hissy fit. I am good friend’s with Amber and have only met Lindsey twice. FH told her we wanted her to read and she said she didn’t want to. He then told her that some of MY sisters weren’t even in the wedding and she basically didn’t care. After some arguing between them she finally said she was happy for us and would do whatever we asked. I know this kind of thing happens relatively frequently because it has already happened within my family, but it was still very discouraging. I wanted to say fine – don’t even come then!
Next, I asked my two friends and my other sister. All were excited and just overall happy for us.
Finally, I asked Amber. I was shocked at what followed. First, she asked if she could stand on his side instead of mine. We told her no. Then, she found out her daughter wouldn’t be a flower girl (FH has one neice, I have 5 neices and 3 nephews so we aren’t choosing favorites and are having no children in the ceremony). She was very rude about this as well. So, I opened my mouth and said (in a “joking” manner) “You know if you don’t want to be in the wedding Lindsey would love to be a part instead.” She was then shocked that Lindsey wasn’t in it, so we explained our view on this as well.
Later in the night, FH asked one of his groomsmen. As Amber and this groomsman were talking to FH they found out who they were each walking with and both came to me complaining!! I told them that it was a total of 30 seconds they would be walking and the rest of the time would be with everyone.
A few weeks later, one of FH’s groomsmen called us and was complaining that he 1-wasn’t best man and 2-was listed last on the website. FH explained it all to him and then he was fine and realized he was out of line.
So.. we have our bridal party, but I am still hurt that the people are being so ridiculous. I feel like it is so selfish, rude, and immature. I can’t imagine saying/doing something like that! They are supposed to be happy and excited for us – this is our day!! Am I overreacting? Has this happened to anyone else?
Thanks Ladies 🙂