Post # 16
I’d say this group of ladies likely may not understand your reasons for not wanting a shower, and I’m willing to give them the benefit of the doubt that they are genuinely trying to do a nice and lovely thing.
In your shoes, I would find a way to spread the word that “My house is fully furnished and I have enough towels/sheets for the rest of my life. I’m honored that you wish to shower me in blessings, but because I have been so blessed and do not need anything, I would feel very honored instead of we used my shower to help a family in need.”
Alternately, explain you don’t need anything, but ask for a recipe shower or something similar?
Post # 17
I must say I am somewhat envious reading your post. I only wish my church (a catholic church full of English speaking expats) were as caring as your fellow parishioners. I am like you though, got a house full of stuff and thankfully do not want for anything.
The sweet hearted church ladies you speak of are from an entirely different generation, and perhaps no matter how you explain it, cannot conceptualize of a new married couple not needing household items.
The best option then, seems to have the party (which at least will be good for the community and socially fun) and donate all the stuff to families in need. It’s hard to see who would “lose” in such a scenario.
Post # 18
A spin on samantha83 ‘s idea: Why not have a ‘charity bridal shower’? Explain to them that you have everything you need, and you would be honored to have a shower where the gifts go to the needy. You can even register for the basics that will truly help those less fortunate. Maybe this will appeal to their desire to throw you a shower and the love of helping others.