(Closed) Bridal shower drama!

posted 5 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 3
4275 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: April 2012

No. Talk to your Bridesmaid or Best Man about this girl.

Post # 4
46411 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

@Peonie854:  If you are not co-hosting the shower, you are in  no way expected to contribute.

B can either ask people to co-host, or she can bear the costs herself. If this shower is supposedly being thrown by her bridesmaids, they are the ones who share in the costs. You are not one of the BM’s.

Post # 5
1572 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

@julies1949:  +1. This girl is off her rocker, and you should let your friend know if she keeps bugging you.

Your friend being in your bridal party has absolutely NOTHING to do with her marriage. If you are not in her bridal party, you are fiscally responsible for nothing when it comes to the bridal showers, bachelorette parties, etc. IMO you are already being quite generous coughing up the $200 for the bachelorette party.

Post # 6
2213 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

@julies1949: +1!

You’re not one of her bridesmaids, so it’s not your problem.  Sounds like you’re already contributing way enough toward her bachelorette, too.

All that should be expected of you is that you show up to the shower, and bring a gift of your choosing for your BM/the Bride.

Post # 7
3569 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

This is nuts! In my opinion, I be pissed off and tell my moh/bms not to have a party if they were going around soliciting money. I hosted,plan or been a part of many showers and they only people who pay for them tends to be a family member and the bridal party. Tell this moh you can’t afford it period! Also what kind of logic is it that you are responsible for a bridal shower for someone who is in your wedding???

Post # 8
74 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

Not her bridesmaid, not your problem.

Post # 9
7 posts
  • Wedding: May 2013

Absolutley not!  If you are not hosting the shower you are not obligated to contribute towards the cost of the shower.  Especially $200, that’s way too much IMO. 

Post # 10
11234 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2013

Whoa, sorry, what? You’re not in the bridal party and she’s hitting you up for money?! $200?! She is outside her mind. No.

Post # 11
4803 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

Whattt?! That’s crazy! I’d tell her she needs to talk to the other BMs, because this has nothing to do with your wedding – you are not in A’s bridal party and cannot help finance her shower (even if you were, $200 would be extreme, but that’s not even the point here.) Don’t even have an argument with her about this – she doesn’t need reasons and you don’t need to justify yourself to her, it’s none of her business! Just say no!

Post # 12
1408 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

@Peonie854:  You are not in her bridal party. You have no obligation to anything with her wedding, except showing up for the wedding, assuming youre invited  

Post # 13
1076 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 2013

Because you’re not in your BM’s wedding party, you’re totally not obligated to help with her shower to that extent, even if money wasn’t as tight for you right now. You did the right thing by politely declining and offering to take care of smaller expenses. Her Maid/Matron of Honor is completely out of line and you should talk to your Bridesmaid or Best Man before this girl can potentially ruin your friendship with your Bridesmaid or Best Man by making this into a huge deal and making sh*t up about you. I wouldn’t put it past this rude Maid/Matron of Honor. 


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