Post # 1
I dont know if i am looking for input or if i am just needing to vent, but i had to get this all out before i explode. My Future Mother-In-Law called Fiance and told him that she was throwing my bridal shower. Well Fiance told her that my bridesmaid and her mom were throwing it, which i had told her several times. Future Mother-In-Law got all pissy and said that her feelings are hurt blah blah blah. So here i am with a pissed of Future Mother-In-Law and a decision to make. She has given us a really hard time about the price of the wedding to begin with, and ripped me a new one about the price of my dress, which she had nothing to do with. Why on earth would i allow her to throw my shower for 50+ ladies? I have thought about the looks and feel of my shower for a while now, and even discussed this with my bridesmaid.Its not like the idea was being tossed around, we had already started talking details. I have 9 months til the wedding, and honestly enough stress with planning the actual wedding, i didnt need this too. Ok im done bitching 🙂
Post # 3
@mattsgirl813: Glad your Mother-In-Law knows she’s throwing you a shower without ASKING you if she could host one? Duh! That’s quite an assumption to make.
Assuming your Mom and BMs can host the same guests your Mother-In-Law was planning on inviting, just decline her offer to host. Maybe your Mom and BMs can reach out to your Mother-In-Law directly to see if she would like to be involved/co-host.
Try not to get riled up about it. My Mother-In-Law pushed the same issue – “I want to help” and “I want to do X for your shower”… and nothing ever materialized. Good thing she doesn’t follow through!
Post # 4
I don’t see that is an imposition to want to hold a shower for you. She could invite her side of the family. Your bridesmaid can invite your side of the family and friends.
A shower with 50 people can be a bit much.
Post # 5
@julies1949: there would only be like 5ish people to invite from her side. We had this discussion when Fiance cousin got married and Future Mother-In-Law wanted to throw her a shower. there are not many females on FI’s side.
Post # 6
your mom and bridesmaids should plan it.. she can always help. are you having a rehearsal dinner? let her plan that
Post # 7
You could just nicely tell her that you think she has already done so much for you and your bridesmaid had generously offered and was already planning it, but maybe pass along her phone number and say that you are sure that she could be involved with the planning.
Post # 8
Look at the bright side that you have all these people who want to host a shower. Maybe she can co-host.
Post # 9
@mattsgirl813: you can have more than one shower.
typically the Maid/Matron of Honor and bridesmaids plans the first one, then anyone else can host a second.
the bride and bride’s mother do not host.