Post # 1
Hi bees! I need help!! My sister and I are both having destination weddings (3 months apart). All of my friends and family are saying we still need to have bridal showers but I just feel so guilty having a bridal shower if we’re getting married out of state. Is that rude to get everyone together beforehand even if not everyone will be able to be at the wedding??
Post # 3
@futuremrsmw: I don’t think it’s rude. If a friend of mine was having a DW and I couldn’t make it, I would love to celebrate with her at a bridal shower. As long as you only invite people who are also invited to the wedding, then I think you are golden.
Post # 4
It’s not rude but should still only invite people invited to the destination wedding
Post # 5
The bride doesn’t have a shower. Someone else hosts the shower. Normally that is someone outside the immediate family, but I have seen Bees post that their mother or sister hosted the shower.
If someone offers to host a shower, by all means accept.
Post # 6
If someone offers to throw you a shower I see no need to turn one down.
Post # 7
@julies1949: I definitely would NOT host my own!! Clearly…lol I’m leary about having one at all, I would never even consider planning my own! Eek!
Thank you ladies for your feedback! My mom and one of my bridesmaids want to throw me one! I guess I’ll let it play out? Thank God for the bee! 🙂
Post # 8
The shower would be a nice way for people, that cannot afford to come to your destination wedding, to celebrate with you.
I’ve always konwn it to be normal to invite some people to the shower who might not be invited to the wedding. Coworkers, for example. Or, if you are having a very small wedding, it is, again, a way to include people that cannot be invited.
As someone else throws the shower, you do not need to worry about the contradiction of invitng someone to the shower, but not the wedding, since you are not, ultimately, responsible for the shower’s guest list.
Post # 9
I felt the same because I was having a DW, but I think the shower gave people a chance to participate in some way when they weren’d able to come to the wedding (they were invited, they just chose not to come).
If your friend and family are pushing for it, I say go for it.
Post # 10
@futuremrsmw: I don’t think it’s rude at all! If you are concerned that people are already spending a bit of money to attend the wedding, stress that you really don’t want gifts, you just want the chance to catch up with your girlfriends before the big day! (and you can totally keep it low key if you’d prefer!) But don’t skip it if you want to have one, no one will think you’re rude!
Post # 11
@julies1949: Depends where you’re from, where I’m from it’s far more common for brides to organise their own shower – I don’t think the traditional rules of hosting apply so much anymore!
Post # 12
The only people invited to a shower should also be those that are invited to the wedding. As long as you do that, there shouldn’t be any problem.
Post # 13
As long as anyone invited to the shower is invited to the wedding!
I had a shower in my home town ( only 3 hours away from the wedding) but none of the women who attended that shower made it to the wedding. So it was nice to celebrate with them anyway.