Post # 1
My co-worker is getting married in less than a month. She’s a really sweet person and I’ve grown quite fond of her. I don’t think anyone from work is invited to her wedding, and it’s totally not an issue because I’m engaged myself and I understand her situation where she can only fit so much people at her reception venue. Anyway, my question is, what’s the protocol for throwing her some sort of bridal shower with work people invited? I’m kind of hesitant to be the one to plan because I don’t want people to think that I want the same thing when I get married next year. On the other hand, I really want to throw her some sort of send-off. Any suggestions? Thanks!!
Post # 3
I think the protocol varies by office.
If you don’t want to seem like you are trying to get people to do the same for you, ask some co-workers who have been in the office for longer than you what they’ve done in the past.
I think taking up a collection (like $5 each) and getting a gift card to where she is registered is lovely. If some people want to go out to lunch or for drinks to "celebrate" that seems reasonable.
Post # 4
I agree that it varies by office. At my old job, I worked with all women. We’d chip in to buy a thoughtful present and reserve a conference room to have a potluck lunch in honor of the bride (or mother if it were a baby shower).
At my new job, I work with all men. Here, everybody chips in $5 for a gift card, and somebody picks up a cake that says "Congratulations!" (I think the only reason the guys even acknoledge weddings and babies is for the excuse to have cake at work!)
Post # 5
It does vary by office but here at my office we have always had a in office lunch for the bride. We would invite everyone and whoever was planning (it was usually more then one person) would pitch in for pizza or bring potluck and we would play some games and give her gifts. It has worked out well for us and we always had a good time. If there are other women you work with maybe get them involved and plan a lunch or an afternoon with cake like linzella mentioned.
Post # 6
My office usually gets together and everyone throws in $10 and we get the bride a really nice "big" gift from her registry. Usually her sheets or bedding or something that one single guest might not be able to afford. We get a card from all of us, and we get a cake.
Post # 7
In my office we send around an envelope for monetary donations and a card "from all of us". That way there’s no pressure to put in a certain amount, or at all. We print off a list of all the folks in the office, and tape it to the front. That way, once you’ve signed the card/put your money in, you can mark your name off the list. Then we usually have ice cream or cakes one afternoon to give the bride/groom/mother/father the gift.
I think if you’ve become close to this woman and would like to honor her, it’s totally appropriate for you to do so! Good luck!
Post # 8
I don’t think anyone would construe your thowing her a bridal shower as a way of hinting that you expect the same treatment next year. I would be more worried about that if you tried to convince someone else to throw one for her (because that person could then do the same for you). Have there been other office parties? How have they been structured? I would take your cues from posterity. At my office we have stuff all the time, and anyone who wants to organize something just goes for it. I think it’s a really nice gesture of you to do this!
Post # 9
My office sent around a card and collected money (they actually asked if we would like money or a gift and I chose money). They had me get my fiance over to the office one day for about half an hour where they could have us open the card and embarass us.
Post # 10
I’d talk to your boss or any partner/executive at your office to determine protocol. At our office, we buy the bride a vase or serving bowl from Tiffany’s and take her out to lunch. The office pays for everything. It is a small gesture to show congratulations on behalf of the office.