(Closed) Bridal shower- gift off registry? Or no?

posted 4 years ago in Gifts and Registries
Post # 16
Member
141 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: June 2016

Some of my favorite gifts at both my showers were things that weren’t on my registry.
I even got some lingerie, a wonderful surprise 🙂

Post # 17
Member
13224 posts
Honey Beekeeper

It is not obligatory at all to buy off of someone’s registry for this or any other purpose. Allegedly the bride isn’t telling you what to buy her since that would be entitled and rude. You or friends throwing the shower have allegedly only searched out or stumbled across a list of things she’s collecting. Really traditional brides don’t register at all. 

A shower is supposed to be about tangible, practical and modest presents, so a physical gift is really considered more appropriate than check or gift card. 

If there’s nothing there in your price range or that you want to purchase, I’d recommend purchasing from a store where there are a wide array of options as well as easy, local returns.

Post # 18
Member
3610 posts
Sugar bee

View original reply
knickergold:  I always buy off of the registry, but in your case, it sounds like she doesn’t have many budget-friendly shower gifts on hers. I’ve seen people go off-registry at showers, and it goes over well as long as the gift is cute and useful. I think outdoor drink glasses would be a nice gift, and thoughtful if she just got a patio table.

Post # 19
Member
2160 posts
Buzzing bee

I would get the masher.  I have a bridal shower coming up and some of the cheaper things on the registry I am just as excited about.  Or a gift card or something personalized.  I’m hoping someone gets us some monogrammed something or something with our new family name.  Can you go in with other bridesmaids on a gift?  Another option would be to just get her flowers or something usable like some bubble bath or a face mask. 

Post # 20
Member
2803 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2016

I would get a gift card.

My biggest pet peeve with wedding registries is when people register for ONLY register for expensive items. Its not very guest friendly. 

I totally get not wanting to just get the masher. It makes you look cheap….even though it’s really not cheap. A gift card is best because $30-$45 IMO is a reasonable amount of money and appears better than a potato masher…especially when you know if she doesn’t get that one, she’ll go get one at target for $10.

Post # 22
Member
2803 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2016

View original reply
bossybride:  self promotion much?

Post # 23
Member
2 posts
Wannabee
  • Wedding: November 2016

smoocheepoo: funny! i am sahring my love for a store i like !!

Post # 23
Member
1 posts
Wannabee
  • Wedding: April 2019

My niece is getting married in April. She has some very expensive items like a Kitchen Aid high end model Stand Mixer, and a complete set of pots and pans. Both are on her “Bridal Registry” at Macy’s. Is this considered a shower gift or a wedding gift? Both of those items are close to $500.00 each! If I spend that kind of money, am I supposed to give another check in a card at the wedding too?

Post # 24
Member
333 posts
Helper bee

Oh man every time thanksgiving rolls around I’m like “hey, I am perpetually in charge of mashed potatoes, and yet I DON’T OWN A POTATO MASHER!” Buy the potato masher. It may not be a “cool” gift, but you know they want it, because they actually told you they want it by putting it on their registry.

Post # 25
Member
614 posts
Busy bee

View original reply
1steve :  Does she not have any other items on her registry other than $500 ones? 

Typically you would give two separate gifts for a shower and a wedding and you would give what you could afford at each. Just because your niece has registered for expensive items doesn’t mean you have to buy them. I also registered for some expensive items knowing that some family members would spend in that price range and that others like to pool their money together for a big present.

If there is nothing on her registry in the price range that you would like to spend for her shower, you can give her a gift card for one of the stores she is registered at. I appreciated gift cards because you could use them to purchase the bigger ticket items.

Post # 26
Member
40 posts
Newbee

If I don’t know the person well, I try to stick to the registry. For close friends, I buy one or two things from the registry and one or two things specific to them that I think they’ll love (that don’t take up lots of space lol).

Post # 27
Member
1974 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: April 2018

That’s the point, it’s a guide to what the couple wants/needs. 

If you go off registry make sure it is something they can use or will love. Or go gift card. Otherwise you run the risk of getting them something that don’t need at all. 

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