(Closed) Bridal Shower Guest List Drama

posted 5 years ago in Parties
Post # 3
Member
1278 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: March 2013

@MexiPino:  Maybe my etiquette wasn’t the best on my bridal shower but I sent a guest list and addresses to my Maid/Matron of Honor of the ONLY people I wanted at the shower. Not ONE person more. My Mother-In-Law asked me a week before to send an invite to one of DH’s aunts who I really should have invited in the 1st place but overloked and didn’t, so I didn’t mind doing that. In My Humble Opinion the bridal shower is about who the bride wants at the shower and if she looked over the guest list and didn’t add anyone, don’t add them. BUT, I would let her know you are getting phone calls and maybe she has an idea of how to handle it because every family is different.

Post # 5
Member
13251 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

1) It’s incredibly rude to not call back someone who has left you a message, whether it’s wedding related or not,  I think it’s more rude to ignore someone who called and asked you a direct question.  So no, it is not okay to ignore the requests.  You have to confront issues as the host.

 

2) Traditionally, all women (who are local) who are invited to the wedding are invited to the shower.  However, if you made a guest list, I suppose you could stick with inviting just who you did invite.  However, sending an invitation to one person in a household and not another, when they’re both invited to the wedding seems a little strange to me.  

 

Post # 6
Member
1880 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

I have NEVER heard of anyone inviting ALL the women who are invited to the wedding… I would think that was excessive unless you were having a very small wedding. And what about for people like my family, who always have mixed gender showers? Would we just invite the entire wedding guest list to the shower? Nope nope nope.

 

As for ignoring it or answering it… I have no idea what would be best. :-/

Post # 7
Member
13251 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

@mjwyatt84:  The bride isn’t supposed to design the guest list.  The bride is not the host of the bridal shower, and therefore, technically has no say over the guest list.  The host decides, generally by asking the bride for the wedding guest list to make sure the appropriate invitations are extended. 

Post # 9
Member
1399 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

I think she was rude for calling and demanding an invitation for someone, especially by voicemail. She should have left you a message asking to call her back, then politely asked “Is my sister invited? She never received an invitation…” Bah. My instinct would to be ignore her, though I know that’s not polite and could start drama. Call back and explain that it’s an intimate shower, that space is limited, blah blah…

Post # 10
Member
1589 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: March 2014

I agree that every family is different so it’s hard for us to judge. Fiance thought it was so weird that I was inviting my grandmother’s siblings to the wedding because he doesn’t know his grandparent’s siblings. Meanwhile mine are close with my grandmother and I see them a few times a year. 

I would just let the bride know about the call and leave it up to her to decide. 

The topic ‘Bridal Shower Guest List Drama’ is closed to new replies.

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