Post # 1
Member
5 posts
Newbee
Its time to start putting a list of names together for my Maid/Matron of Honor for my bridal shower. Now, my fiance and I both have large families so as far as the wedding is concerned we arent going to be able to invite alot of friends due to budget restraints. However, there are ALOT of friends that I would like to celebrate this time with at my bridal shower. Is it tacky to invite people to the bridal shower that won’t be invited to the wedding? I don’t know what to do. Its not so much about the gifts as it is about just wanting to celebrate with those people. What do you all suggest?
Post # 3
Member
699 posts
Busy bee
Totally depends on your area/friends. Can you try asking a few of your friends that may or may not be coming about it? I have been to more than one bridal shower where I wasn’t invited to the wedding.
Sometimes it was direct invite, other times it was open invite in the church bulletin.
Post # 4
Member
1346 posts
Bumble bee
Yes it is tacky. It’s like asking for gifts. If you want to celebrate with those friends, then after the wedding maybe have a house party or do a dinner at a restaurant.
Post # 5
Member
11752 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
I would never invite people to any wedding-related event if they weren’t invited to the wedding. It’s poor etiquette, anda even though some people might be okay with it, not everyone will be. I’d err on the side of caution personally.
Post # 6
Member
1729 posts
Bumble bee
@mrsfelda0914: Personally, I would be offended if I was invited to a shower (which means = bring a gift or money) but would not be invited to the wedding. I wouldn’t do it.
Post # 7
Member
1102 posts
Bumble bee
I wouldn’t invite people to your shower who are not invited to the wedding.
Post # 8
Member
1144 posts
Bumble bee
I would be a little insulted if I was invited to a shower and not to a wedding tbh. It’s like am I not good enough to be invited to both? Totally awkward. IMO, only people who are to be at the wedding should be at the shower.
Post # 9
Member
7904 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
- Wedding: March 2012 - Pelican Grand Beach Resort
In general, showers are only for wedding guests. The exceptions are work and church showers.
Post # 10
Member
5 posts
Newbee
thanks for all the feedback..I am just so torn because financially we are unable to invite all our friends. I still love them and want to make them feel included and I thought maybe this would be the best way but I didn’t know if it was tacky. Ughhh this is so stressful! I just don’t like upsetting people or hurting anyone’s feelings.
Post # 11
Member
184 posts
Blushing bee
@mrsfelda0914:
I live in the southern United States. It is considered poor etiquette to invite people to your teas and showers and not invite them to the wedding.
Post # 12
Member
2059 posts
Buzzing bee
Can you have a ‘housewarming’ or ‘welcome home’ luncheon or casual dinner party after the wedding & you get back from your honeymoon? Invite your friends and people who could not be invited to the wedding. That way you could still celebrate with your guests but they would not have to bring a gift.
