- 5 years ago
- Wedding: May 2014
Note: I am mexican, and in our culture we invite EVERYONE we can to bridal showers, even if they are not invited to the wedding. It is a custom in which everyone help each other. Please, no bash. Also, I am a christian and in our church we are pretty close with each other. Medium size church (about 400 people)
Ok, I am crying right here. UGH.
Lets start: My mom is throwing me a BS. She and my aunt are the main organizers, with MOG, grandma (mom’s mom), cousins, friends helping. I was pretty worried that she wouldn’t invite my dad’s mom (my parents are divorced and my mom is very hurt with her ex-MIL). My mom told me she didn’t want my dad’s mom in the BS in anyway. I was very sad about it and tried to convince her, since she is my grandma and very important to me, with no luck. I prayed a lot for her to be cool with my grandma being there…
My grandma began asking me about the BS, and I told her I had no idea what they were doing (that was true since my mom hadn’t settle on anything) but that I would call her as soon as I knew anything. Weeks passed and my mom called me, she told me who the organizers would be (I am making the invites). To my surprise, she included grandma!!! I was soooooo happy!!!!
I called grandma, told her about the date and about her being an organizer. I told her she only had to give what she could for the party (not a “required” ammount of money). She told me that there was going to be a baby shower for someone in church the same date, so people would be divided.
I called mom, to see if we could change the date, but we couldn’t. Everything else was booked and my mom can’t come in anyother time (she doesn’t live in the same city as I do). So I talked to the lady who is throwing the baby shower for her daughter. I told her I was so sorry the dates were the same, she was very nice! Said: no worries, everything is going to work out, people will bless you both. She also said she wanted to be a part of my BS! She is amazing.
So, I talked to grandma about this and she said that it was OK! So I thought everything was fine! I was very excited!
Past sunday my aunt (dad’s sister) told me she wasn’t going to the shower, because my dad invited her to his town to spend the holidays and she wanted to go as soon as her kid went out of school, because she would have to come back soon because of work. I, of course, was sadden and dissapointed. I mean, this is my family, I love them. But I smiled and said “thats OK” and let it go.
Today, I was FaceTiming with dad about honeymoon resorts and stuff. He then told me next weekend he was taking his mom to Mazatlán and then taking her to where he lives… I was like: “Oh! that’s cool!!!!… wait what? what about my BS, isn’t she going to be here?” He said no, she is going to throw you a mini BS with people from church later.
I was shocked!
My dad started talking about how my mother was selfish for not including my grandma. I said she did include her, that I told her and was very clear about it. Then he started saying that she should have talked to grandma personally and whatnot.
I started crying (damn PMS) he went all “ooh there you go again as always”
I excused myself and hang up.
I know my mom is not being the biggest person. She is hurt (my grandma gave her a lot of crap)! For me, including my grandma at all was a HUGE thing for her and I was SO gratefull!
But for dad and grandma it wasn’t enough. Let alone the issues with my mom. IT IS MY BS!!! Can’t they stop being children for a little while for me? for my WEDDING?
Apparently not. I have to be in the middle of their problems, as always.
Thank you for staying and sorry for the long post :C