Post # 1
My lovely Maid of Honour was going to host a bridal shower for me, but the budget for this at-home (apartment) tea and sandwich affair somehow became super expensive. She is looking to me to pay for it. I could afford a lower-end videographer for the price of the shower. I can’t have both.
So… to the ladies that have had their weddings. If I make a splurge, would it be better spent on a shower or a videographer?
Post # 3
I would say videographer. In the long run you won’t care about the shower, but you MIGHT care if you don’t have any wedding video.
ETA: not to mention, if its your bridal shower, you really shouldn’t have to pay for it.
Post # 4
Huh? Someone is hosting it for you and you have to pay for it? Wow.
I think that’s the height of rudeness, unless you offered to help out with expenses.
Post # 5
You really shouldn’t have to pay for your own shower… at all. It should be hosted, I don’t know how a tea & sandwich affair could cost the same as video!
How many people does she plan on inviting? And what is her budget? Is there any way to keep it underbudget?
Post # 6
Hmmm… You don’t typically pay for your own shower! I find it a little odd that she’s trying to stick you with this bill. Hopefully you can just plan a more simple, less expensive shower (if you have one at all). I’d definitely put the money towards a videographer.
Post # 7
I think it’s pretty obnoxious of you Maid/Matron of Honor to ask you to pay for the shower. If anything, she should try to reduce the cost so she and your other BMs, mom, etc. can pay for it. You are already hosting a wedding, you don’t need the extra expense of throwing yourself a bridal shower. I would go with the videographer.
Post # 8
get the videographer
1. you shouldnt have to pay for your own shower
2. even if you did pay it shouldnt be that expensive.
you probabaly wont miss a shower if you dont have one but ,aybe an aunt or someone could host it? it could really be simple. just have it at someones house and put out beverages and cupcakes, maybe like a fruit tray or a cheese tray and crackers.
it could easily be done for well under $100
Post # 9
Thanks ladies 🙂
I don’t know why she’s thinking it would be so expensive (it’s about 30 people, and I’m sure she was factoring in champagne and flowers and other non-necessities), but I do understand her challenge in that my immediate family doesn’t live here, and she’s the only bridesmaid that does, so she doesn’t have the support of my Mom or siblings or other BMs to help share work & cost or venue. My parents did come to town last year and throw us an engagement party at my Aunt’s house though, so I’m lucky I had that.
Anyways, sounds like the low-end videographer is the winner hands-down! Appreciate your help!!
Post # 10
- Wedding: March 2012 - Pelican Grand Beach Resort
I find videography completely unnecessary. I have never once watched anyone else’s video and all my friends and family who got videography watched it when they first got it and haven’t looked at it since. I’ve never even watched my parents’ wedding video. The only way I would consider it is if I had a huge budget and were going to get one of those excessively beautiful, highly edited videos. Since that’s not in your budget anyway, I’d skip the video. I wouldn’t skip it because of your choice. I’d just skip it. If anything, I’d put that money into better photography.
as for the shower, you should not have to pay for it and your MoH should simply change the plan if it has gotten too expensive. I gave my BFF a shower. We made tea sandwiches and salads that we made with panera copycat recipes. We had champagne punch and flavored iced teas. We also had a grocery store cake. I spent less than $200 on the entire thing. we invited something like 35 people and had 20 or 25 there, and there was food leftover.
if I had to choose between the two, though I think this is an unnecessary choice, I’d choose the bridal shower because I think experiences, especially those you share with others are so so so important and fulfilling and I’d rather have the memories of 3 hours spent with my nearest and dearest celebrating than another momento of the wedding since you will already have your memories, photos, and the photos of friends.