Post # 1
(Sorry for the weird format. Not sure why I can’t fix it!)
Hi Bees! I’m dealing with choosing a bridal shower date and tryig to figure out which is the lesser of two evlis. I’m an out of town bride and headed back to my hometown/where the wedding will be on Memorial Weekend (May 22-25) for an earlyish weekend long Bachelorette Party with my girls.
The wedding date is August 8, and when the time comes Fiance and I will be flying in on July 31st to be there just over a week before the wedding.
Is it better to have my bridal shower the Friday evening of Memoral Weekend (it would have to be that Friday) or the Sunday before the wedding?
Here are my Pros and Cons:
- Memorial Weekend Cons:<br />-It’s a Holiday weekend. And one that’s very well known for people camping/leaving/going out of town. No one besides me is traveling for it, so it wouldn’t ‘help anyone out’ with having a long weekend to travel or anything.<br />-It would have to be Friday evening. Which obviously puts more stress of my hostess since it is a ‘dinner time’ one and gives it a less casual feeling.<br />-My Friday looks like this: arrive from airport at 8:00 AM after five hour flight. Hair trial. Make Up trial. Dress Fitting. Then Saturday we’re leaving pretty early for a two hour drive to where the Bach Party is. So it’ll be a really really busy weekend.<br /><br />
- Memorial Weekend Pros:<br />-It’s the perfect timeline. I think a bridal shower two months and a week before teh wedding is soon enough to get excited, but not too far out to annoy guests.<br />-I’ll have my hair and make up trials that day so I’ll look awesome!
- Sunday Before Wedding Cons:<br />-It’s a week before the wedding<br />-Since I am an out of town bride, there might need to be more last minute things done than I forsee. Although I do have a wedding planner, and she’s amazing, so if I decide this and tell her about it she’ll make sure there’s enough advance stuff done to keep me on track.
- Sunday Before Wedding Pros:<br />-It’s a Sunday afternoon. And it’ll be a a lake house, so we can enjoy the weather and sunshine! <br />-Not a holiday weekend<br />-My Sister in law did hers the week before and no one seemed to mind. And we’ll have much of hte same guests.<br />-it would be nice to not have to fit my bridal shower in during crazy Memorial Weekend
Post # 2
Jamichristine05: Nooo… do NOT do your shower the week before your wedding. You WILL have last minute things to do, but more importantly, you should just be trying to be calm! It’s not time for a party! Plus, at least for me as a guest I’d find it too expensive. I generally don’t think to buy gifts until shortly before the event. So if you have a shower a month before, it’s better for my budget. Otherwise the shower gift + wedding gift becomes a burden.
Friday night will be fine. Have it be heavy appietizers instead of dinner. Start at like 7. Showers don’t go long anyway. Or else do something easy like a stuffed baked potato bar! She can do the potatoes in a crockpot. Everything else can be preped ahead of time and just laid out in little bowls for people to plop on themselves. To beef it up and you can have additional crock pots with meat or chili options.
Post # 3
If the rest of your guests aren’t travelling and you’ll be there anyway, do it a week before the wedding. We got married Sunday of Memorial Day weekend and my shower was on that Saturday (yes, the day before). I didn’t want to ask anyone else to travel twice for the shower, or have to choose what they could attend. We had brunch at a nice restaurant, very low key. It was really nice to be able to relax and hang out with my friends and family. I even wrote all my thank-you’s that afternoon and had them in the mail before the wedding. It was a nice distraction from just sitting around and worrying about everything else. If you’re busybusybusy up to the minute the wedding starts, you’re doing it wrong.
Post # 4
Any week is better than the week before your wedding. So Memorial Day weekend it is!
Post # 5
I’m getting married Memorial day weekend so I don’t see it as a problem 😉
Post # 6
I had one of my showers (my side and friends), and my bachelorette party the Saturday before Labor Day. My sister (MOH) organized it all and sent out Save the Date emails around memorial Day, just to give people a heads up. I also polled some friends who I knew would have to travel, to see if that weekend would even work. It’s hard finding a time that works for everyone! It worked out, and a few friends that I wish would have been able to make it couldn’t… but that’s OK.
Plus, having both the same day didn’t force out of town friends to have to come back for a bachelorette party later on. Even if they may need to get a place to stay for both nights, it probably just works better for everyone.
I’d go Memorial weekend, as having it right before your wedding seems like it might be too much – especially when you’re seeing these guests that same week.
Post # 7
i think either sounds fine so i would defer to what works best for your hostess. that said, i’m having a bridal shower (though more a cocktail party than a traditional shower) on the thursday evening before my saturday wedding. the hostess is out of town, and will be there then for it and my out of town fmil, grandmother and moh will all be there thursday on for the wedding. so it can work! it’s not stressing me out at all, i think it will be great 🙂
Post # 8
Jamichristine05: anytime I’ve been to a wedding for an Out of Town bride the shower always seems to be the Sunday before the wedding and it’s what I generally expect.
Friday night seems odd to me for a bridal shower for some reason – it feels like a Sunday afternoon activity.
Post # 9
Thank you everyone so much for the opinions! Honestly, I still think I’d rather do it Friday before Memorial Day… I like the idea of it being a few months before. But, since the host has made it pretty clear she’d feel much better about doing it the week before the wedding, I’ll probably tell her to have at it. I’ll just make sure my Wedding Planner knows so she can keep me on track, and hope that no one feels too inconvenienced about it whole situation!
And I do like the idea of a Sunday lakeside brunch :)!
Post # 10
I would do it Friday. It is inevitable that some won’t be able to make it since they will be out of town for the weekend but I wouldn’t do it the week before your wedding. I was trying to squeeze in last minutes engagement photos that would only take an hour the weekend before the wedding and ended up canceling because I had so much to do and was so stressed. When you are that busy even something fun is stressful and I wouldn’t want to feel that way about my shower.
Post # 11
Memorial Day weekend. Never do a bridal shower only a week before the wedding 🙂
Post # 12
Definitely Memorial Day weekend!
Post # 13
I don’t think you will get much attendance the Friday night of memorial day weekend. It depends on who is on your guest list I suppose but IMO people won’t want to attend on the start of the holiday weekend even if they aren’t traveling.