- 3 years ago
Hello Helpful Ladies,
I’d like some opinions, advice and suggestions if you’ve got anything for me.
My mother lives to host parties, loves it. So naturally, throwing me a bridal shower is an exciting prospect for her. My guestlist is quite small, an intimate shower would be nice. BUT, she would like to supliment the guest list with some of her friends (about 5 women, who I have known for many many years) who are not invited to the wedding.
I know, and I in no uncertain terms told her that you can’t invite people who aren’t invited to the wedding to wedding related events. She doesn’t agree on the basis that she has been invited to showers for their daughters without being invited to the wedding. Again, told her this was rude and under no circumstance did I want this.
The thing is, I know she is upset about this. She is kindhearted and loves to host people and this really is her thing. I know she is excited and wants to share it with her friends too. So, I’ve been entertaining the idea of a shower-like gathering but make it clear that this isn’t a gifting event (for everyone, not just the friends).
So, my questions are thus:
1. Is this even ok? If it is a non-gifting event does that make it alright?
2. If we were to add the friends what do we call this, for the sake of the invitations? I’ve heard the term “Bridal Brunch” before, but this will be more of an afternoon tea; so if anyone had any ideas I would appreciate your help.
3. How do you get the word out about no gifts? I know gifts aren’t supposed to be mentioned on an invitation, but that showers are different because people anticipate gifting so I want to be made crystal clear that there are to be no gifts. Word of mouth? Or is it alright to put something about “showering with love only” (please please offer me a better wording alternative).
I want to make my mother happy, she really does mean well, but I also would feel extremely awkward having bridal shower guests that weren’t invited to the wedding. Any advice is greatly appreciated.