Post # 1
I have a shower/etiquette question for ya’ll. I live in Portland, OR but am from Seattle, WA. I have a lot of friends and family in WA and a decent sized group of friends and family-to-be here in OR. I have 2 MOH’s.. one in WA, one in OR. Is it rude to have 2 bridal showers, one in each state? Would it be more rude to have just 1 and make everyone from one state who wanted to attend drive 3+ hours to do so?
I assumed I would have 2, but I have gotten some feedback that asking for 2 bridal showers is too much. I would never expect 2 parties, and I of course would not expect anyone to go to both… I am just trying to come up with the best option and I would love some outside opinions :). Thank you!
EDIT*** I am not planning or asking for any showers or parties. My BM’s, MOB and MOB are bringing this topic up to me and I was just curious what others thought/did. 🙂
This topic was modified 3 years, 4 months ago by stevielee.
Post # 2
I’m having two showers, one nearby where we are getting married, and one in conneticut where a lot of my family is from. My cousin offered to throw the second one since she knew she wouldn’t be able to attend the other one since we are 6 hours away and is at the end of the school year.
Post # 3
stevielee: Having 2 bridal showers is not rude. However, ASKING for 2 bridal showers is rude. You should not ask anyone to throw you a bridal shower. If your MOH’s in each state offered to throw you a bridal shower in their state, then you should happily accept.
Post # 4
I would just make sure to have minimal cross over on your guest list. BMs, your mom, Mother-In-Law, and any sister or SILs not in the wedding party are the only ones I would invite to both. Everyone else limit to one or the other.
It’s only bad if you are inviting everyone to both and expecting gifts twice.
Post # 5
I’ve had 3 kids get married in the past 3 years. Each one had 3-4 showers for differing reasons. Some had families in a different state, for one it was because after her parents divorce the two families didn’t want to attend together, one of my daughters got engaged when she was still off at school and her school friends had a lingerie shower for her, and in one case two hostessEs wanted to host in their homes so the guest list was split up with friends at one and co workers at another. Now granted we are from a big family and a smaller community so one big shower might work out for others but I don’t see why it’s offensive, rude or gift grabby if other people would like to throw you a shower.
Post # 6
soontobemrsKB92615: I would never ask! One of my MOH’s is asking, as is the MOB and MOG. I honestly hadn’t thought about it until now when everyone seems to be wondering. A couple people have thrown out that I should just do 2 while another has said no to 2. I will happily go along with whatever is planned.
Post # 7
stevielee: Then perhaps you should edit your post. It still says you are asking for 2 showers
“I have gotten some feedback that asking for 2 bridal showers is too much”
Post # 8
are people willing to travel for your wedding and not the showers? If not, then I don’t see the harm in two showers for the people who still want to celebrate but wont be able to make the drive. Seems to me I would position it with all the people you plan to invite and see how they feel.
Post # 9
I had two showers for similar reasons – my MOH/MIL/Florida BMs threw me one down here and my stepmom/stepsister who was also a Bridesmaid or Best Man threw me one in South Carolina where they (and a lot of my family) live. I don’t see any problem with multiple showers as long as there is no guest list overlap and it doesn’t get out of hand (for example, five showers or something – two or three is reasonable though IMO).
Post # 10
It won’t let me edit again. (As you can see, I did add an edit previously). I am not asking for a shower, I have never and would never, end of story.
Just looking for opinions on the 2 showers thing, thank you :).
When the idea was brought up to me by one of my MOH’s I wondered if people would hear I was having 2 and think it was ridiculous. It sounds as if it is not uncommon and that if that’s the way they want to plan it then I shouldn’t worry about it. Thanks girls!
Post # 11
I don’t think its a bad idea. All of FI’s family is from out of town four hours away. I told them I would be happy to make time to come down if they wanted to have an event they didn’t have to travel for. So, I don’t think its awful if someone else is asking to throw it.